


Here Comes the Sun

by Beetlebum



Category: Across the Universe (2007)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-04
Updated: 2017-09-19
Packaged: 2018-01-03 11:21:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 38,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1069873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beetlebum/pseuds/Beetlebum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Max came back from Vietnam he was undoubtedly a changed man. With Jude gone, his sister depressed, the gang split up, and a dwindling relationship with his girlfriend, Max begins to think that his world is falling apart around him. But after a particular letter comes in the mail, things begins to change. What other surprises await him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I'm just now finishing up this story thanks to some encouragement from[Kmartenn](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Kmartenn)! While I was grabbing the rest of the chapters from my old computer I saw that I saved the little "character buttons" I made back then, so I thought I'd include them for fun~_   
>    
> 
> 
> # Canon Characters
> 
>   
> 
> 
>   
>  _ Max, Lucy, Jude, Prudence, Sadie, and Jojo _   
>    
>    
> 
> 
> # Fan Characters
> 
>   
>    
>  _ Sally, Peter, Marcus, Carol, Faith, Jack, and Lizzy _

        _Early spring in New York City always held the chill of winter in its winds. But even that would not make the people sit closer than two inches apart from each other on the bus. In those days, back in 1967, the only ones who used public transportation were businessmen and poor folks, and those two groups never did tend to mesh well. But occasionally there would be an escapist: someone who was running either from or towards something. One such soul had found herself placed towards the back of the bus, at least two inches away from her seatmate, with her forehead pressed against the cool glass window. Her green eyes stayed affixed forward, taking in all the bright signs and brick buildings through quick blurs. There was a thin layer of frost on the outside of the glass, formed by the cold temperature and drizzling rain. In many ways, the weather mirrored the young woman's thoughts._  
         “It's about time you got a real job.”  
         “Aren't you old enough to have aspirations by now?”  
         “Wouldn't you think you could get into college?”  
         “You shouldn't spend all your time partying _.”_  
        _Distant voices from the reaches of her memories lurched to a halt along with the bus. The steady, soft screeching of tires brought her eyes from a distant place. The young woman brought her striped scarf further up over her red nose and rose to her feet, gathering her backpack and slinging it loosely over her shoulder. Shoes shuffled away from the center aisle when her low heel black boots thudded softly down. Tucking her arms in tightly, she pulled her sunglasses down over eyes that stayed strictly to the floorboard._  
_The sounds that filled her ears as she took the last step onto the sidewalk were drastically different. Cars honked loudly and men shouted; people sang on the sidewalks. Through her sunglasses she observed a few free spirits dancing in the streets. New York was indeed a very far shot from her previous residence._  
_“We would sing and dance around!” Rough hands grabbed onto hers and pulled her a few steps forward and into a twirl. “Because we know we can't be found!” The man sang through his salt and pepper mustache, showing two partial rows of crooked, yellow teeth. Again he twirled the woman, “I'd like to be under the sea!” His a capella song drifted lazily into the air as he sent her on her way with a polite smile and a wave. “In an octopus's garden in the shade!”_  
_It was the deep-seeded southern hospitality that pushed her hand up into a wave in return. Just as soon as the “magic” came, it went. The young traveler was left only with a smile and a cocked brow, continuing down the sidewalk. The singing man was the first distraction en route to her new apartment, but he certainly was not the last. Despite all the painted ladies and flashy tuxedos, she finally did make it._  
_Two flights of stairs later, she felt as though she could at last lift the burdening backpack from her shoulder and set it down harshly on the floor below her. Relinquishing a sigh the woman rapped her knuckles against the wooden door. Looking up, she saw a ratty “206” scratched into a small, dull golden plate. If the woman's memory served her correctly, this was the place._  
_The clinks and clanks of several locks echoed in the small hallway, followed soon by the loud creaks of old door hinges. A rosy red light spilled from the door as it opened. The strange color dazzled and tingled her eyes for a moment. Blinking the feeling away, she could take in the sight of the  looming silhouette before her. The first thing she noticed was his bright floral button-up shirt, only accentuated by circular spectacles that just matched the lighting behind their bearer._  
_“I like your shades,” came an oddly familiar tone. She was certain she'd never met the dark-skinned gentleman before, but the way he carried himself was just so casual. Immediately she felt as though she had known the man her entire life._  
_“Thanks! I like yours, too.” Managing to stammer words together for the first time since she arrived, the young woman pressed on, “Are you...Marcus?”_  
_“Well I'm not Carol or Faith!” His cheery voice seemed to cause a bit of unrest in the space behind him._  
_“What the hell are you shouting about out here?” It was certainly a woman who spoke this time, and her voice grew closer by the second. Marcus was pushed aside an inch or two and a small, blonde woman with mussed hair was sneering out at the new arrival. “If you really plan on living here I'm going to have to ask you to try to keep it quiet. I'm a light sleeper.” She tucked herself back into the apartment and vanished behind a purple curtain draped loosely over an archway._  
_“Don't mind her,” Marcus spoke sympathetically. With a quick motion he had turned his head over his shoulder and he called out, “It's not your fault she stayed out until four in the morning!”_  
_“Piss off!”_  
_He turned back to the woman standing before him, still out in the hallway, which seemed entirely drab in comparison to what awaited her beyond that front door._  
_“Come on in.” Once Marcus turned and made his way back into room, his newest roommate followed suit. “And don't mind Carol; she's usually a real sweetheart.”_  
_“I think she likes me already,” the woman chuckled out a sarcastic reply, dragging her backpack behind her as she still attempted to catch her breath. “You used to the walk up here yet?”_  
_“That's what keeps me and these other heifers in shape!”_  
_“A heifer?” a new voice piped in from across the room. “Come on, Marcus, I'm at least a little better than that. Ooh, is this our new roomie?”_  
_“Faith, I almost forgot you were up. You just stay quiet don't you, girl?”_  
_“Yeah! And those are the ones you've gotta watch out for!” The girl brought up her hands and curled her fingers into faux claws, “Grr!” Her snarling face was animated enough to rightly deserve the several freckles that illuminated it, with matching bright red hair, of course._  
_“I'm Faith...like he said!” She roughly brought her hand against Marcus's back, giving him a few pats._  
_“Ouch, easy! You want this chick to think you're psycho already?”_  
_“I don't know! Will that keep her from going through my things?” Faith gave a gentle jab or two at the much taller man's ribs._  
_He jerked away from her, “Someone's got to keep that junk pile you call a room clean!” The redhead rolled her eyes with an exaggerated, classic hands-to-the-hips gesture. “We keep things lively around here, as you can see,” Marcus turned his attention back towards the brunette. Still he managed to hold the warmest smile that she could imagine._  
_Faith seemed to reconcile with her friend easily, made obvious when she wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her head into his bicep._  
_“Okay, so I remember you're from Texas,” she looked up to the newcomer, “but what was your name again?"_


	2. Yesterday

         “Come on, come on! The light ain't gonna get any greener!” As he shouted the man managed to keep his cigarette clenched between his teeth. His fist pounded harshly against the horn in the middle of the steering wheel. In a swift movement his free arm slapped violently against the outside of the car door, crackling the black numbers from the yellow paint. Horns of retaliation blared into his ears from all different directions. Upon grabbing his cigarette with his thumb and forefinger, he was quick to shout his own cursing rebuttal, which was fortunately drowned out in all the noise.  
         “Calm down, Max.” Her voice was feminine and exacting, but managed to sooth him in spite of all the tumult outside the vehicle.  
         “Sorry, Sally.” He gripped the plastic steering wheel tightly and wished to somehow will his nerves away. “I'm just worried about Lucy. She sounded pretty upset on the phone.” His blue eyes were wide and shifty. Dark circles rested neatly just under them. Gaunt cheeks would easily show a frown if not for the thin, blonde mustache and even thinner layer of stubble surrounding his lips. With a practiced ease he took a long drag from the cigarette between his fingers. Still his left heel tapped in quick succession, and he sent shaky puffs of smoke out through his nostrils.  
         “I thought you said your boss didn't want you smoking in here anymore.”  
         “Yeah, and I thought he was 'helping me out.'” Max's fingers curled into air quotes as he spoke, and he was quick to inhale the acrid taste of tobacco once more. Through pursed lips he pushed the smoke from his mouth. As the line of cars in front of him began to move, Max flicked his cigarette forcefully onto the asphalt below. “Fucking cigarettes,” he muttered through clenched teeth. With a fist clenched just as tightly, he rolled up the window with a few quick and harsh jerks.  
         Sally's hand rested softly on his knee. He jerked away from the unpleasant jolt of surprise that surged through him. The confusion and hurt in her eyes was something that he had grown painfully aware of, and sadly something that he had become used to. As Sally pulled her hand back into her own lap, Max pressed his foot onto the gas pedal. He jumped again at the loud sputtering that came from the taxi's tailpipe. Hurriedly the man blinked his eyes, pulling himself forcefully from the oncoming flashback. Those glimpses of flashing lights and dripping blood had too grown very familiar to him.  
         “What was she talking about anyway?”  
         “Huh? Who?” Max fought to keep his sight on the road before him. He struggled briefly to remember where he was going.  
         “Lucy?”  
         “Shit! Lucy!” As soon as the recent memory had faded it reappeared. The vehicle's speed increased greatly as the acceleration pedal was pressed roughly into the floorboard. The passengers' bodies swayed this way and that against the swerving motions that were made.  
         “Jesus!” Sally chided the driver. Her hands fumbled in earnest for anything they could grab onto. “What the _hell_ is the big emergency?” The woman's voice had grown shrill in no time at all, “Is someone _dying_ or something?” There was no reply.  
         Max was far too gone in his thoughts.  
         “Jude's gone,” was all his little sister could managed to choke out over the phone.  
         “What do you mean he's _gone_?” he had croaked in surprise.  
         “His dad couldn't prove he was his son, and they kicked him out of the country, Max! They kicked him out of the fucking country!” Rarely did he ever hear his little sister use the same vulgar vocabulary as he, and that simple fact was enough to tell him that she was neither joking nor apathetic.  
         “I'm on my way over,” he had spoken into the receiver, giving her no chance to reply before hanging the phone up. He had thrown his brown hat and nearly-matching jacket on when he hurried out the door. Remembering he had promised Sally a date that very same evening and hour he made a quick stop at her house on the way, apologizing profusely and trying his best to fill her in on the situation. But try as she might, Sally just couldn't understand an emergency that could not be properly explained to her. His jerky movements and rapid speech were difficult enough for her to follow. And the sudden surprise of their date night being ruined only put salt in the wound.  
         “Max! Max!” It was his girlfriend's panicked cries that pulled Max back into focus. His eyelids fluttered and spread wide open at the bright red taillights illuminating his vision. As he slammed his foot onto the brakes, the two jerked forward. Having stopped just centimeters from quite the fender bender, Sally decided she had had enough.  
         Her dark black pigtails whipped around when she turned for the door handle.  
         “Sally, wait! Please wait, I'm sorry!” Max called out after her, leaning miserably into the passengers seat she had left empty. He reeled back as her face suddenly appeared in the rolled-down window once more.  
         “I don't know what your problem is lately, but call me when it's _fixed_!” Her high heels crunched over the granite of the sidewalk, and the sound grew further and further away. Max stayed staring out the window, his blue eyes growing dim and far away once more.  
         As of late, not many women stayed with Max for very long. That was the way it had always been for him, and that “lifestyle” had worked out for him very well lately. Most days Max could fake it, and some days he felt as though he was completely back to normal. But there was no hiding the simple fact that after his honorable discharge he was a changed man.  
         “Everything below the neck works fine,” he would joke, silently ribbing himself for what he couldn't help. Usually that was enough to keep people from questioning his occasional odd behavior. So one-night-stands didn't matter to him much.  
         Sally was different. She had attracted his attention at first glance. The way she spoke to him drove him wild. She would always pour his drinks slowly, just to stay close to him for a little longer. Her blue eyes would always shine brightly behind her slick, dark hair as she gazed at him. And to really put the cherry on top, she still stayed after that first night. She stayed after the first week. And still after a month she stayed. But Max couldn't hide his troubles from her for forever.  
         Never did Max think he would have a “girlfriend” for a solid month. The sentiment struck him as odd for a moment. It seemed as though just last month Jude had been deported and Lucy had called him, crying.  
         “Jude's gone,” the words reverberated in his mind as though he had only just heard them.  
         The man practically convulsed back into his own seat and grabbed the steering while tightly. His body rocked quickly back and forth. “Fuck, fuck, _fuck_ , I'm losing it!” Lucy did not call him earlier that day. She had called him a _month_ ago. So where was he going?  
         The poor man's heart beat rapidly, and his eyes flicked quickly back and forth.  
         A loud horn blared behind him and he shot up, letting out an involuntary yelp in the process. A huge gap had formed between he and the cars before him. Trying to stay calm, Max pulled up past the traffic light and on for just a few more meters, only to slow to a halt again.  
         He must have dreamed it. It was a dream he had had a few times in the past, but never had he taken so long to snap back into reality after waking up. Usually by the time he got to the front door he could break himself from the trance. But now even Sally had seen it. Max could only imagine how greatly it had confused and upset her. She must have thought he was crazy. He _was_ crazy.  
  


✼✌✼

  
  
         The apartment was virtually empty. With Sadie, Jude, Jojo, and Prudence gone things just hadn't been the same. It was the nights when Lucy stayed out that were the hardest for Max. Sometimes he could call Sally and invite her over, but those nights came so rarely as of late.  
         A quick clank of several conjoined keys sounded from the small glass table where they'd landed. Max looked down when he heard the soft crinkle of paper underneath his foot. The mailman had carelessly slid the mail under the door again despite his and Max's repetitive arguments. He spat a curse at the wet shoe print he'd now left on the letter. Nudging the door closed with his hip, he bent down to retrieve it. A quick inspection left him questioning reality once more. In his hand he held a letter addressed from a certain Jude Feeny. And to Max's surprise, it was addressed to him. Why not Lucy? He had to find out. His fingers tore at the envelope's seal, and he gently retrieved the letter within.  
  


> Dear Max,
> 
>          It's been too long since I tried to reach out to you, but I hope you can understand what I'm feeling. I read in the papers what happened to Lucy. I couldn't bring myself to write to you just yet, knowing what I do. But I know I need to stop being selfish. And I know losing your sister must be just as hard.  
>           For a while I didn't know who to write to, but I at least knew where to send it. Surely someone from the gang must still live in our apartment. But I hope this letter finds you well. Last I heard you were being released from the military. I know Lucy would have been glad to have you back.  
>           Let's please keep in touch.
> 
> Jude

  
  
         The man could feel his hands shaking. He almost struggled to pull one up and through his stringy blonde hair, pushing his hat from his head and onto the floor. Jude never wrote because he thought Lucy was dead. Why hadn't he considered that before? It didn't matter, though. He had to tell his sister. A thought struck his mind: but what if something goes wrong? Cruel as it was, Max knew he would have to keep his communication with Jude quick and secret. Jude would come back to the states,  Max decided, but it had to be a surprise. Once Jude and Lucy were back together, things could go back to normal. For a moment his mind felt at peace.  
         The notion struck him once more that he held in his hand a letter from Jude, one of the best friends he had had in a very long time. He _wasn't_ gone forever. Max had been filled to the brim with excitement; he had to let _someone_ know.  
  


✼✌✼

  
         “Hello?” she asked hesitantly from the other end of the phone.  
         “Hey, Sally,” Max said, his voice cracking.  
         “Are you feeling better now?” The concern in her voice caught Max a bit off guard, and his heart skipped a small beat.  
         Pushing through the butterflies in his stomach, he replied to her, “I got a letter from Jude in the mail!”  
         “Oh.” Max's heart sank with her tone of voice.  
         “No, no, this is great! If I can get him back to Lucy, everything will go back to normal! Get it?”  
         “That isn't what I remember _normal_ being. I remember _normal_ being you and me after my graveyard shifts having a few drinks and talking about our lives. What happened to that, Max?” he could hear the strain in her voice. It left him breathless and wholly despondent. “Lately it seems like every time you're around me you're just...jumpy and weird! Are you on drugs or something?” He stayed quiet, much to her chagrin. “Are you cheating on me?” For the second time that day her voice had gone shrill. And for the umpteenth time that day Max had completely zoned out. This time pleasant memories of the early days with Sally frolicked into his mind.  
         “Say something to me! What's wrong with you, Max? Why did you even call me?”  
         “Oh, I...” his heart raced as he fished around his mind for what could have possibly just happened while he had been lost in thought. “I um... I got a letter from Jude!” Through the forced excitement he could feel that he hadn't responded correctly.  
         “Leave me alone!” Max had pulled the phone quickly from his ear at the loud static that meshed with her distraught shouting.  
         For the first time in a while he could feel intense anger growing in his stomach. He didn't understand why Sally couldn't be a little more excited for him. Why was she so snippy lately? It seemed to Max that every time in his recent memory he had mentioned anything he deemed _worth_ mentioning, she had only reacted negatively. She wasn't being a good girlfriend. And, he decided, he wouldn't let her sully his great news.  
         Absentmindedly the man reached out for a hammer that was placed neatly on the kitchen counter and softly banged its head on the smooth, hard surface. With the first real, unbridled grin Max had had in a long time, he re-read Jude's letter once more.


	3. Help

         “...I spent all night trying to write a good reply,” he finished his story with a large and very genuine yawn. “I doubt lack of sleep is gonna help me today, huh?” Max always felt so lively during his group therapy meetings. There was just something about being around people that _got it_ that made him feel like he could loosen up a bit. It hadn't been that way from the beginning, though. When he had first started to attend his PTSD “meetings,” Max stayed quiet and clammed up, seeming much more interested in the cracked tile floor under them than actually sharing _feelings_. But Lucy had wanted him to go, and he didn't feel right refusing her request.  
         In the young man's good fortune there had been another gentleman his age in the group. It was an odd feeling to be surrounded by men in their forties and fifties, especially at the odd realization that now he had more in common with them than most of his other leftover “friends.” But Peter had been the one person in the group he really resonated with, and the past few visits in particular had been filled with affectionate, buddy-buddy roughhousing (despite the psychiatrist's paternal scolding).  
         “Do you think he'll be able to get back in the country?” Peter had remembered enough about Jude from Max's recent stories.  
         “Yeah, of course!” Max flicked his lighter on as he spoke out of habit.  
         “Please put that away, Mr. Carrigan,” came the stern, monotone voice of their adviser.  
         “Shit, sorry,” he apologized before tucking it away in a swift movement. It wasn't uncommon for Max and Peter to break away from the group and into their own conversation, but that shrink of theirs always seemed to have his eye on them. Some days he would have to politely interrupt another patient just long enough to tell Max that he had started punching Peter a little bit too hard. Of course Peter would never say anything; he would only keep pushing weak laughs out. But Max had gotten better about it quickly. Peter was a good guy, after all. And after Max had heard _his_ story, he decided even he shouldn't have to deal with the usual bullshit Max did to show people he cared.  
         “I bet your sister's gonna be real happy!”  
         “I haven't told her yet. I think I want to keep it a secret. That'd be one hell of a surprise, wouldn't it?” Max sighed, “One that she damn well deserves.”  
         “Okay, gentlemen,” came the monotone voice again, “come join the rest of the group for this next exercise.”  
         Upon exchanging a quick, exasperated face with Peter, Max reluctantly turned and scooted his chair appropriately. Space was easily created for the two young men to join in, making the group into a lopsided circle.  
         As everyone settled, the adviser began to speak: “The point of this next exercise is to express your thoughts. I ask that this week you _all_ participate.” Thick black eyebrows lifted over black rims, and brown eyes stared past the glass lenses at the two solitary “youngsters” of the group, “And I do mean _all_ of you.”  
         Max didn't hesitate to show his distaste and cross his arms over his chest. This was his least favorite exercise, and by far the least fun in his book. What good did it do for everyone to blubber about their problems in public? He just didn't understand the logic behind it, and he had refused to participate to this day. The past few times Peter had shyly agreed with his friend and stayed respectfully silent.  
         “We can start with you this time, Mr. Carrigan.” His head tilted low, Max's blue eyes could barely see past his furrowed brow, but still he managed to stare icy daggers at the man across the circle from him.  
         “You want to know how I'm feeling?”  
         “Please. Enlighten us.”  
  
         Max sprang to his feet as a sudden crescendo of music fell upon them all.  
         “ _Help! I need somebody!_ ” he sang loudly, just barely keeping in time with the quick pacing. Men all around him jumped at his sudden movement, and some even shielded themselves from possible danger.  
         “ _Help!_ ” This time they chimed in with him, voluntarily for the most part. “ _Not just anybody!_ ” They gathered around the psychiatrist in a tight, uniform circle and continued on, “ _Help! You know I need someone! Help!_ ”  
         In precise lines the patients all returned to their seats and sat up straight as boards. Max sang alone once more, and he sat slack, picking at his nails. “ _When I was younger, so much younger than today, I never needed anybody's help in any way._ ” His foot began to tap to the beat, and his fellow group members all sang him on to support him.  
         “ _Now,_ ” they seemed to coax him, and Max continued.  
         “ _But now these days are gone,_ ” “ _These days are gone,_ ” “ _I'm not so self assured..._ ”  
         “ _I know I've found..._ ” still the men coaxed Max on.  
         “ _Now I've changed my mind and opened up the doors!_ ” A smile had just twisted the corners of his mouth as the clock struck twelve. The music ceased. Soon everyone was gathering their things and leaving, off to try and make it through another week without therapy. It had been made painfully obvious in that moment that they cared about Max just as much as the next guy.  
         “Are we still meeting at the bar later tonight with the guys?” Peter prodded gently as he walked past Max who was still sat askew in his chair. At Peter's question Max found himself sitting up and pulling himself together.  
         “Yeah, man. I'll see you there.” He waited until everyone had left the room before he stood and made his way out to join them. Looking across the parking lot, he finally saw what he sought: Sally sat in the driver's seat of her brown car with an agitated look on her face. Although Max had never told her what his meetings were _about_ , she was still willing to pick him and give him a ride home without question. A nagging feeling told him that that was about to change, especially considering just how the past week had gone. In fact, this was the first time he had seen Sally in a couple of days.  
         She hadn't seen him walk out yet, and Max was hesitant to approach her car.  
         “ _Help me if you can, I'm feeling down,_ ” he crooned as a soft, down-tempo melody sounded around him. “ _And I do appreciate you being 'round. Help me get my feet back on the ground. Won't you please, please help me?_ ”   
         Sally didn't speak to Max as he opened the car door and took a seat. She didn't even look at him. Still there was a great disconnect between the two. It was a pattern Max was quickly growing tired of.  
         “ _And now my life has changed in oh so many ways,_ ” he continued on with the music. Of course Sally didn't react. The wall between them was too thick for her to possibly understand how he was feeling. “ _My independence seems to vanish in the haze._ ” He stared through the window, pressing his forehead against the cool glass. “ _But every now and then I feel so insecure,_ ” Max pried himself out of his depression just long enough to gently touch his hand onto her leg. Finally she allowed him a glance. “ _I know that I just need you like I've never done before,_ ” he sang.  
         The sight of his bright blue eyes pooling with tears made her break down her barrier for the first time in a while. She bit onto her bottom lip which begged to quiver and pulled off of the road into a parking space along the sidewalk. Giving Max her full attention, Sally waited and listened.  
         “ _Help me if you can, I'm feeling down,_ ” he sang to her, and only her. “ _And I do appreciate you being 'round. Help me get my feet back on the ground! Won't you please, please help me!_ ”  
         Now Max lie in bed, and Sally lie close next to him. He stroked her bare arm and watched her as she slept. “ _When I was younger, so much younger than today,_ ” the man pulled the plain white sheets further over their naked bodies, “ _I never needed anybody's help in any way. But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured... Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors._ ”  
         Leaning down to kiss her forehead was another thing he had just started to miss. “ _Help me if you can, I'm feeling down,_ ” his voice now fell to the soft and simple tunes of  a lullaby, “ _And I do appreciate you being 'round. Help me get my feet back on the ground. Won't you please, please help me,_ ” he paused for a small moment when Sally turned to adjust her position, pressing her face closer to his chest, “ _Help me, help me, ooh._ ”  
  
         The gentle tone of the cuckoo clock woke Max from his nap. With a start he sat up, seeing the straight line of six o'clock. Sally wasn't next to him anymore. The cold wood of the floor stung against his feet as he crossed the room. With a quick glance out the window he could see that Sally's car was gone as well.  
         “Damn it all,” he grumbled to himself while he pulled a pair of boxers on. In mere moments he had dressed again and headed back out into the chilly air. The walk to the bar was thankfully a short one; he was already dreadfully late. Would Peter even stay there by himself for a whole hour? He hoped so.  
  


✼✌✼

  
  
         “Max!” Peter's voice was nearly too cheerful. In fact the poor fellow sounded somewhat exasperated.  
         “Hey, Petey, sorry I'm late.”  
         “That's okay, bud. Don't even mention it.”  
         “Are any of the other guys here yet?” The bar stool creaked under Max's weight as he sat down. He held up his index finger to the bartender who knew his face well enough to know exactly what this silent code meant.  
         “Lawrence came in for a little bit, but he got bored.”  
         “What about Marcus?”  
         Peter paused and pondered. “...No, he hasn't come in yet. I think last week he said something about getting a new roommate, though. He's probably busy with that.”  
         “Ah,” Max didn't hesitate to take a hardy swig of the beer that had been placed in front of him. “Too good for us old joes, huh?”  
         “You got that right!” No one was surprised at his loud, boisterous voice anymore. But Max certainly was surprised by the rough pat on his back that accompanied it.  
         He coughed through a smile. “You tall bastard!” he exclaimed, calming himself, “You're an hour late!”  
         “Don't try to play me like that, cat, I saw you walking in here from down the street.”  
         “Yeah, well,” Max let the sentiment linger, unfinished. But he did continue to smile. Marcus just had an uplifting energy about him that made anyone feel at ease. Besides, those rose-colored specs of his were enough to make anyone at least grin.  
         “So how'd the meeting go, you two?”  
         “Max started to open up!” Peter was the first to chime in.  
         “Well don't that just beat all! Doesn't it feel good to finally express yourself?”  
         “Eh, I don't know.” Max gulped down more of his beer, finishing off the glass. Again, he held his index finger up to the bartender.  
         “Oh, come on, man! Loosen up and let it out!” Max's back was met once again with Marcus's large, open palm, and this time he was thankful he didn't have a beer in his grasp. “That reminds me –  I've got a proposition for you two!”  
         “Is that so?” Max lifted an eyebrow in interest.  
         “My new roommate is a journalist--”  
         “Here we go!” Max teased.  
         Marcus butted his shoulder against the scrawnier man and laughed as he continued, “and she wants to do an article, but she needs someone to interview. I think one of you can help her out.”  
         “She? Marcus, you got _another_ girl living there with you? You could start a brothel before too long!”  
         “Behave, Maxwell; they're all nice girls. What can I say? I'm a real chick magnet!”  
         Max chortled out a laugh, “Either way, let my man Petey here take care of it! Who knows, he might get himself a girlfriend out of the ordeal!” Peter had shied away from the idea quickly, but still at least seemed interested. “What's it about?” Max added.  
         “That's the tricky part,” Marcus sounded serious now, but still somehow incredibly comforting. “She wants to do a piece about how the war has affected soldiers. And she really wants to get an interview with a retired veteran to get the kind of feel she's going for.”  
         “Somethin' anti-war, huh?” Max asked casually. “Petey, what do you think?” Both Max and Marcus were surprised to see that Peter had now reserved himself entirely. The young man's dark eyes stared soullessly ahead.  
         “Hey bud,” Max cooed, “it's okay; no one's gonna make you think about it, Petey.”  
         At his friends words Peter's gaze at least returned to normal, and he nodded softly.  
         Satisfied with his results, Max gave Marcus his attention once more, “Does she need to do the interview tomorrow or something?” He wasn't exactly happy to agree, but he was at least happy to help his friends get by.  
         “Naw, naw, she won't need to talk to you 'til some time next week; she's still got a few more things to do before then. But you can just come over to the apartment if you want and get it done real fast. She won't ask you anything too personal, I promise.”  
         Of course Max believed him. “All right, all right. You talked me into it! Now buy me this next beer to celebrate!”  
         “...And me too!” Peter chimed softly in once more.  
         “Petey made it back!” Max cheered aloud, “I'm buyin' all your drinks tonight, buddy!”


	4. No Reply

         That day marked the third in a row that Max had seen hide nor hair of Sally. Confiding in Lucy had done little for him. His sister was just as lost as he, it seemed. Their matching blue eyes reflected each other so well in hue and sadness both. In those three days Max had gone to Sally's house several times, and every time he did, there would only be silence on the other side of the door. Once or twice he could almost swear that he saw the curtains moving; but whenever he looked directly at the window there was only the still, white fabric. Honestly it wouldn't surprise him if he _had_ been seeing things.  
         The idle ticking of the clock across the room suddenly seemed loud to him. Growing closer was the soft patter of Lucy's black flats. It was strange to even him how he could distinguish his sister's feminine gait from the other tenants that always clunked around outside. Her pace was quicker than usual. She unlocked the door in a matter of seconds, and Max was pleasantly surprised to see a smile on her face as she stepped through the doorway. So surprised was he, in fact, that he couldn't stop his own smile from forming on his thin lips.  
         “So apparently,” her words were tinged with a light air, “Sadie and Jojo are getting back together.”  
         “Get outta here!” Max exclaimed, jumping up to his feet with, holding his arms up almost victoriously. His grin stretched up and squinted his gleaming eyes.  
         “Yeah! They're having a rooftop concert at Sadie's studio this Saturday.”  
         “That's fantastic! Where is that place, anyways?”  
         “I'm not sure, but--”  
         “Never mind that; so everyone's getting back together?” Max did well to keep the secret he had locked away inside his brain and decided to stop himself before he let on anymore.  
         “Well...almost everyone.” Her open mouth fell softly, just resting on her shoulder as she looked away.  
         “Come on, Luc! All hope isn't lost, okay?” Bringing his arms up and around her, Max pulled his sister into a strong hug. It hurt him to see her like this, but he couldn't tell her – not yet, anyways. Unfortunately nothing was set in stone just yet. Over Lucy's shoulders, Max eyed the door. No mail had come in for days, and he was starting to get worried.  
         “I'm gonna...go...do something...” Understandably, Lucy was always looking for excuses to leave the apartment. Max could tell by how still she stood when she looked at one of Jude's scribbles up on the wall. She stood still, and she stood there for a long, long time. And why should she want to surround herself with the reminders? They had been everywhere for her lately. But she'd started to run out of excuses.  
         Trying his best not to be an over-bearing older brother, Max would always let her go where she pleased. As much as her company made him happy, he couldn't force her to stay where she didn't want to be anymore.  
         The thunk of the closing door made Max wonder how long he'd been standing there, silent, before she decided to leave. As much as she supported him, he was aware that his state must have been strenuous on her as well. In a quick burst of aggression Max kicked harshly at the wall behind him. His leg sprung up and away from the pain, and he grabbed his foot. Hobbling over to the couch, he muttered a few rather outlandish curses and plopped down.  
         As if on cue the phone began to ring.  
         “Can't a guy just break his toe in peace?” Exasperated and agitated both, Max pushed violently against the sofa and gingerly stepped towards the telephone. “Yeah, what do you want?”  
         “Easy, Maxwell, it's just me, Marcus.”  
         “Marcus! Hey, sorry man, what's up?”  
         “I just wanted to let you know my roommate said she should be in around nine o'clock this coming up Saturday. You can make it, right? I know it's kinda early for you, but...just help the girl out and I won't bother you for nothin' else ever again.”  
         “That definitely sounds familiar,” Max ribbed.  
         “I mean it this time! I appreciate it; I know it's not the easiest thing to talk about.”  
         “It's no problem. The toughest thing for me is just dealing with pricks. She's not a prick, is she?”  
         “Far from it!” Max relished the laughter he heard from the other line. “Alright, Maxwell, I'll talk to you later.”  
         “Okay, man.” There was a slight ring as he set the phone down. A gentle calm washed over him when he looked around the room. Saturday was going to be a great day: The gang was getting back together, and Max might even be able to let off some steam before the show. He just hoped he would be able to get Jude back before then. Lucy would be so happy if she could see the show with him.  
         While Max had always been nothing but supportive of Lucy and Jude, he sometimes found himself a bit jealous of them. They were happy together – truly made for each other, and Max overflowed with excitement when he remembered he would be a part of proving just that to the both of them. But...why couldn't he have that? The closest thing he had to a “true love” was either locked up in her apartment or away on a secret vacation.  
         Upon staring at the phone for several long moments, Max began to dial a number he had remembered by heart since day one. The ringing in his ear was droning and monotonous. Every pause made his heart sink deeper and deeper. Minutes later he grew tired of the noise and let the phone fall onto the table. Still it rang. What was he doing? His lower lid twitched.  
         “Just pick up the god damned phone!” He barked out. Only a steady ring met him. “Stop fucking with me!” He couldn't stand it anymore. A heat wave passed over him, and in a haze he picked the phone up, yanking the cord forcefully from the wall and threw it clean across the room. It banged loudly against the kitchen wall and fell to the floor, cracking miserably. He cared not to fool with it at that moment. Instead he threw his jacket on and left the apartment, slamming the door behind him.

✼✌✼

         Hard knuckles knocked heavily on the door to Sally's apartment. Easily the repetitive sound created a beat.  
         “ _This happened once before,_ ” Max sang through clenched teeth, “ _When I came to your door..._ ” He pressed his ear firmly to the chilly slab of wood that kept him outside. “ _...No reply..._ ” With a sharp glance at the window, he saw the fabric shaking softly, settling, “ _They said it wasn't you, but I saw you peep through your window._ ”  
         Inside the apartment a light was extinguished, leaving the room dark.  
         “ _I saw the light!_ ” Max began to point frantically. His voice rose and he looked around, hoping to prove to anyone that he wasn't just imagining things for once. “ _I saw the light!_ ” He exclaimed once more. “ _I know that you saw me, 'cause I looked up to see your face!_ ” Passersby gave the man strange looks as he slid down the door to rest on the stoop underneath him.  
         “ _I tried to telephone,_ ” his voice was nearly pleading. “ _They said you were not home,_ ” Now he stood and gave the door a few feverish punches, “ _That's a lie! 'Cause I know where you've been--_ ”  
         “Max! What are you doing!”  
         Turning, Max observed Sally staring at him. There was a gentleman stood uncomfortably close to her with wide and fretful eyes. “ _And I saw...you walk in your door... I nearly died... I nearly died..._ ” He sounded confused, almost, but as he spotted the cupped hands between the two, he felt dizzy for a moment. “ _'Cause you walked hand in hand...with another man...in my place..._ ” It was as though he could barely hear the words coming from his mouth, much less believe that they were true.  
         But indeed, in an act of sheer guilt and fear, the man bolted from the scene and raced down the sidewalk. Sally gave Max an angered look as he stepped down onto the sidewalk with her.  
         His face contorted and showed the anger he was feeling, “ _If I were you I'd realize that I,_ ” he grabbed her arm forcefully and pulled her close to him, “ _love you more than any other guy. And I'll forgive the lies that I..._ ” he pulled her closer into a hug, “ _heard before when you gave me no reply._ ”  
         But Sally pushed him away. “What are you doing here, Max! Can't you take a hint!”  
         “ _I tried to telephone,_ ” he explained in a loud tone, “ _They said you were not home. That's a lie! 'Cause I know where you've been! And I saw you walk in your door!_ ” Desperation pulsed through him. “ _I nearly died... I nearly died! 'Cause you walked hand in hand...with another man in my place..._ ” Now the realization sunk in.  
         “Max, I...” All at once her shame came into the light. “I can explain. I'm sorry, please just come inside...”  
         “ _No reply..._ ” he sang, staring at the blank air ahead of him.  
         “Max, I said I'm sorry! Don't ignore me!”  
         “ _No reply..._ ” Pushing past her, Max calmly walked towards his taxi. Sally followed him of course, tugging at his wrist which he would only pull back away from her. His body practically fell into the driver's seat, and Max was quick to pull the car door shut. Sally had at least been smart enough to stay away from the car that was soon replaced by skid marks and a puff of gray smoke. He saw reflected in the rear view mirror that she stood staring after him, coughing into a balled up fist. But Max didn't care. As far as he was concerned, he was done with Sally.

✼✌✼

         “Petey! You in here by yourself today?” Max's cheery voice made his presence known when he strolled into the bar. His friend looked over with a start.  
         “I come here by myself sometimes!”  
         “Trying to get away from me, eh?”  
         “That's not true!” The playful expression Peter had held was replaced by a worrisome one.  
         “Don't worry about it. I'm just stopping by for a few quickies to drown out my sorrows. Maybe if I'm lucky I can take a dame home with me.” For a moment Max could feel liberated. But Peter was quick to keep him in check.  
         “What? What about Sally?”  
         He stayed quiet just long enough to hold his index finger up to the bartender. “What about her?” came his cool reply.  
         “Did she break  it off with you?” Peter's soft voice was sympathetic.  
         “Apparently.”  
         “Oh... Sorry, Max. That's okay, though. I thought she was a real... _b-bitch_ anyways.” Now, Peter never cursed. At least he had never cursed the entire time Max had known him. He stared somewhat shocked at his friend, and was met with a hesitant, anxious face.  
         Max laughed. “You got that right, Petey! Hey, pal, get this guy another one on me!”  
         “Is that all it takes for you to by me drinks? Call your ex a...bitch?” In a strange way it was precious when the meager man allowed himself to speak in such a way.  
         “You can call _anyone_ a bitch and I'll buy you a drink!”  
         A glass or two and a few funny stories later, Peter finally brought up the question Max had been dreading: “What happened with Sally, anyway?”  
         He let out a long, exaggerated sigh before replying with a short, “It's weird, man. It doesn't matter now anyways.”  
         “Come on, Max... You've got to get it out of your system. We both know that!”  
         “...I hadn't heard from her in the past few days, so I went to her house. Next thing I know she comes walking up with some meat-head, holding _hands_ with him. They looked like a perfect couple alright.” The touch of Peter's hand on his back was a welcome change; usually it was Max comforting him. “I guess she just got tired of me. Not everyone can handle Max Carrigan, I guess.” A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.  
         “I don't know how you manage to never stay serious for very long.”  
         “ _God damn it, Max! Would you just be_ serious _for_ once _?_ ” The sudden and vivid memory stifled his laughter. He began to recall that Thanksgiving dinner, the first time Jude met his family.  
         Had Jude written back yet? Was Lucy home? If she saw a letter from Jude it would ruin everything!  
         “Hey, Petey, I gotta go. Sorry.” Max pulled a few crumpled dollars from his pocket and tossed them onto the counter. “Get yourself a few more drinks before you call it a night, okay? ...Thanks, man.” Briefly he put his arms around Peter and patted his back. “You're a good friend.” At the notion his dark eyes lit up with surprise and excitement.  
         “No problem, Max! I'm here any time you need me! That's what friends are for right?”  
         “You got that right,” his soft reply was accompanied with the memories of his Princeton days. “I'll be back in to see you next week. Maybe sooner, who knows. Definitely next week, though! And maybe you can meet Jude!”  
         “Yeah, that would be great! And don't let that _bitch_ Sally try to hook back up with you!”  
         With a boisterous laugh Max tossed a few more dollars onto the table and left.

✼✌✼

         From the street below the apartment Max could tell that Lucy hadn't made it back home yet. Boyish excitement surged through him, and the few flights of stairs barely seemed like an obstacle at all. Soon the door swung open, and he looked down to see...only his shoes. A set of odd footsteps came up the stairs, and Max was quick to spin around and hang his upper body over the banister.  
         “Hey!” His voice called angrily down the spiraled stairs, “What's the deal, pal? I haven't gotten any mail in days!”  
         “Did you check the box?” came the haggard reply.  
         “The box? When the hell did you start putting the mail in the _right_ place?”  
         “Since you nearly knocked my head off last time! There's no pleasing you kids, is there?”  
         “God damn it!” Max fumbled around for his mailbox key and raced down the stairs, shoving past the mailman he had just been arguing with. The small key pressed just to the side of the hole, scraping with an unpleasant noise to the side. “Come on,” he jittered, finally sliding the key in and pulling the little door open.  
         Only one letter sat lopsided in the small box. That was enough to make Max's face light up. He barely remembered to lock the mailbox before racing back up the stairs, tearing into the letter along the way.  
         Catching his breath, he leaned against the closed door, safe in the privacy of his apartment to read the scratchy letters that graced the paper he held before him.

> Max,
> 
>          I've already bought a ticket. I will be at the Port of New York Saturday morning at around 9:00. I look forward to seeing you again. Is there any way we can keep this a secret from Lucy? I kind of want to surprise her.
> 
> Jude

         The last sentence struck him, and his grin had only grown devilishly larger. “Great minds think alike,” he pondered aloud. Already he was scanning the letter over and over again. It was finally happening. Jude was coming home. 


	5. All You Need is Love

          A loud banging jerked Max from his slumber. Saturday's cool breeze drifted in from the open window. By the time he had gathered his wits about him, the banging had stopped just long enough to be forgotten. But soon it came once more, and was accompanied by a worried voice.  
          “Maxwell, are you in there?”  
          “Marcus...?” His groggy state left him even more confused than usual. Hurried steps lead Max to the door. When he began to lazily unlock the three locks he used his free hand to scratch at the stubble on his neck.  
          “What's going on, man?” Max gave Marcus a quick once-over, noticing the large camera that hung around his neck.  
          “Don't tell me you just woke up.”  
          Panic flooded him, “What time is it?”  
          “It's eight thirty.”  
          “Shit! I'm gonna be late!”  
          Marcus smiled, much to Max's confusion, and slapped his shoulder, “It's okay if you're a few minutes late, man. She can wait.”  
          “Huh?”  
          For the first time Max could ever recall, Marcus's smile faded, and he brought his arms tightly across his chest. “Don't tell me you forgot.”  
          “...Shit!” was Max's all-too-familiar cry. “Marcus, man, I forgot! I'm sorry!”  
          “I told you about this _Tuesday_ , Max. It's not that hard to plan around something when you've got that much notice.”  
          “I know, I know, look--”  
          “No, _you_ look, Maxwell.” His large index finger pointed straight at the scrawny man's chest. Once again, Max was experiencing a “first” with Marcus: this was certainly the first time he had ever been _afraid_ of him. Suddenly his tall stature felt so much more important as he leaned in past the doorway. “I don't know what _else_ you've got going on by now, but...” Marcus took a moment and stepped back, calming himself down with a long exhale through his flared nostrils. “I think Elizabeth is up already. If you hurry, maybe she'll let you do the interview early. She ain't gonna hold you up too long; she doesn't have much free time herself lately.”  
          Max thought for a moment and then frantically began to nod, “That should work, yeah.”  
          “Good. I've got to go to work, but I'm looking forward to hearing all about it from Elizabeth when I get back. I know she's excited about this.” With no time for Max to reply, Marcus turned and stepped hastily down the stairs and back outside. Max rushed to the window, looking out to watch him continue on down the street.  
          He threw his shirt and coat on and grabbed his keys before rushing out the door. Gripping tightly to the railing, Max skipped every few steps to get down the few flights as fast as he could manage. Out the door, he picked himself up into a hurried pace down the sidewalk towards Marcus's apartment. But as he passed a payphone, he stopped dead in his tracks.  
          “Fuck!” The realization that he hadn't made his planned calls to anyone hit him like a bullet to the gut. Casting his blue gaze down the street, he could just barely make out a woman sitting in the windowsill of Marcus's apartment building.  
          “Sorry...Elizabeth,” he struggled for a moment to remember what she had been addressed as. An easier and more truthful apology came from him quite suddenly, “Sorry, Marcus...”

          The grimy quarter was pushed into the coin slot, and Max's fingers were dialing rapidly across the number pad. After a few rings a familiar voice tingled Max's ears.  
          “You got Sadie.”  
          “Sadie! It's Max!” He was nearly overwhelmed with joy. “Listen, I've got something to tell you! But you can't tell anyone else, okay?”  
          “You know how I like secrets,” she spoke casually, as though it hadn't been several weeks since she'd spoken with him.  
          “Well, I mean, you _can_ tell _someone,_ just _not_ Lucy!”  
          “What is it, Max?”  
          “Jude's coming back! I'm gonna pick him up at the port in about an hour!”  
          “Honey, if you're messing with me I'm locking you out of the studio.”  
          “No, I'm serious! The gig's at eleven, right?”  
          “I'm surprised you remembered,” he could almost hear the smile in her mature voice.  
          “Me too, but hey! I'm bringing Jude up there, and we're gonna surprise Luc, okay?”  
          “Alright, I think I can handle that. Oh, hey, I've gotta go get ready. Here's Prudence.” Max's heart skipped in surprise. Prudence was there?  
          “Max!”  
          The sudden, loud voice startled him, but he was quick to match her enthusiasm. “Hey, Pru! I didn't know you were gonna be there too!”  
          “Well you know me; I can't stay away! What's got Sadie so bubbly this early in the morning? You know, besides your charming voice.”  
          He laughed in excitement, “Jude's coming home!”  
          “What!”  
          “Yeah! But Lucy doesn't know so don't tell her, okay?”  
          “Of course! Does she know where to go?”  
          “Ah, no... For that matter, neither do I. Hang on just a second.” In his excitement he didn't think to try and gently set the phone down. Fishing through his jacket and pants pockets both, he let it fall down onto the floor of the booth, just barely held up by the cord. Of course, Max didn't have a pen in his possession. Reaching down to retrieve the phone, however, his eyes quickly spotted one just in the corner. He grabbed up both items and rested the receiver between his cheek and shoulder. Fortunately, the black ink bled out onto the back of his hand as he tested it.  
          “Alright, Pru, lay it on me.” Just as quickly as she had recited the building's address, Max was jotting it down.  
          “And there's a door in the back we'll leave open for you. Got it?”  
          “Got it! Hey, what time is it?”  
          “It's almost nine.”  
          “Already? Shit! Do me a favor and tell Lucy where the gig is. I'm out of time and change. I'll see you there, Prudence! And remember not to--”  
          “Tell Lucy. I got it, Max! Drive careful!”  
          “Will do!”

 

✼✌✼

 

          Smoke billowed in a thick cloud from Max's pursed lips. From his perch of choice on the roof of his Taxi, he kept a watchful eye on the square building in the short distance. It seemed like it wasn't very long ago he had been somberly singing out to his friend in vain, wanting so badly to get in touch with him. With a smirk he noticed how strange and funny it was that Jude had sent him a letter only a couple of days later.  
          People had gathered around, all staring steadfast at the Port of New York. And then, finally, a large blur of black jackets came lurching out. Max squinted his eyes, taking in another long puff from his cigarette.  
          There he was.  
          “Jude-y, Jude-y, Jude-y, Judy Judy Judy, Jude-ay!” He flung himself to his feet and stood on the roof of his car, waving his arms frantically in the air. Gripping tightly the blue bars of the gate between them, a surge of excitement hauled him up a few inches. Sneakers made contact with the hard ground underneath him. With lithe movements Max dipped to the side of the gate's opening and threw his arms out to his sides.  
          “Max!” Jude called out. Having put a bit of a jump in his step, he got a running start at his friend. His arms had been splayed out just as wide, mirroring Max's body language. When they made contact both men threw their arms around each other, and Jude lifted Max a few inches off the ground.  
          Of course, Max did little to stop him, and he was surprised when Jude began to carry him towards the car. But he held onto him tightly and even brought his hand up to grip the back of his head. He could barely believe what was happening. Once Jude had set him back on the ground the both of them looked at each other for a few moments, and their excited, boyish grins matched exactly. After a few playful shoves and small pats they found themselves in the taxi, headed home.  
          “You don't look too messed up!” Jude exclaimed and slapped his hand onto Max's shoulder.  
          After a quick glance away from the road he gave a laugh, “Yeah, well, everything below the neck works fine!”

 

✼✌✼

 

          Growing closer to their destination, Jude changed the subject onto what he found to be an important matter. “She know?”  
          With his eyes fixed to the road, Max had tried to keep a straight face. But he allowed himself a small smirk with his simple reply. “Uh-uh.”  
          “You didn't tell her?”  
          His familiar cocky air was most welcome, having been absent for such a long time now. “Nope.” Max tilted his head to the side and he looked over his shoulder to give Jude a smile.  
          “Alright, good... Good.” Jude had quickly become preoccupied, leaning his head out the window and biting at his thumbnail. Max wanted to tell him that he had been planning this whole thing from the start, albeit very sporadically. But his better sense told him to stay quiet. And it was fortunate that it did, as the short silence was split with the jaunty voice of the DJ on the radio. Gently, Max leaned forward to turn up the volume.  
          “ _Don't let me down,_ ” came the dulcet tones of a warm voice.  
          “...Is that Sadie?” The sound of disbelief stuck to Jude's voice.  
          Apparently Max had forgotten to tell them about their little pit stop. “Shit, we're late!” He pressed his foot harder onto the gas pedal while Jude leaned back in his seat with an airy laugh.  
          The traffic, of course, had slowed immensely. Max could feel himself growing tense. It seemed like every light they caught was red. A minute or two passed and finally brought the pair to the right building. They made their way through the crowd that had started to form in front of it.  
          “Come on, through the back,” Max gave Jude a quick gesture to follow, and they ran through the small alley beside the studio.  
          What seemed like countless flights of stairs later they emerged.  
          To Max's unpleasant surprise, Lucy was nowhere to be found. His eyes had surveyed the entire rooftop and she just wasn't there.  
          “Yeah!” It was Prudence that drew Max and Jude's attention first. She lifted herself to her feet and waved at them both. At Max's silent “come here” gesture she ran forward.  
          “Hey, Prudence!” Jude was quick in giving her a warm hug, lifting her small body just off the ground. “How are you?”  
          Giggles rose from her into the air, “Good! Welcome back!” Just as soon as she had been set down, Max gently gripped her arm and bent himself just slightly to be at eye level with her.  
          “Where's Lucy?” he queried almost too sternly.  
          “I don't know!” was her quick reply, “She should be on her way!”  
          “Well did you give her the right address?” Maybe he was being too difficult on his young friend, but his plan was quickly starting to fall apart.  
          Prudence's voice stayed just as sweet as always, “Yeah. I thought I saw her on the street!”  
          Max had turned himself in the perfect position to notice the door to the rooftop swinging open. “Oh, shit,” he stated flatly. Before him he saw a river of police officers streaming out. Pulling himself from his panic, he made a protective barrier around Prudence with this hands. “Let's go.” Gently he began to guide the girl away from the group. It had no effect; they still stayed in the sights of the suited men.  
          “Off the roof,” one of them gruffly commanded the two.  
          “Come on,” Max gave Prudence a small push towards the door. Three of the officers had split off to escort them, and still they were the last two headed down the stairs.  
          “Where did Jude go?” Prudence was clearly distraught.  
          “I don't know, and where the _hell_ is my sister?” He turned to give one last glance at the roof, but he was quickly prodded by a policeman.  
          “I'm sure I saw her, Max.” Down the stairs they went. Max had managed to stay quiet until one of the officers started to get too rough.  
          “Hey, get your hands off me!” he shouted out. They didn't seem very intimidated at his threats and only continued to hold their hands out to guide him. The group grew closer still to the ground floor. Again Max looked around to try and find Jude. Where did he go?  
          “ _There's nothing you can do that can be done,_ ” an a capella voice came softly from the rooftop. “ _Nothing you can sing that can't be sung... Nothing you can say, but you can learn how to play the game..._ ”  
          Max and the others stopped and turned in unison. They all craned their necks and looked up back towards the roof.  
          “Who the hell is that?” was the inquiry of a police officer.  
          “ _It's easy..._ ”  
          “Jude?” The old gang spoke in tandem, curiosity piquing each one more than the last. Every person in the stairwell turned and raced each other up. Jude's gentle voice continued to drift down to them all through the audio system. A smile began to grow on Max's face until a particular lyric struck him.  
          “ _All you need is love,_ ” his friend sounded as though he were in great pain. He didn't need to see him to understand that. “ _All you need is love,_ ” he continued on. The sentiment vibrated through him, and again Max wondered where on earth Lucy was. “ _All you need is love...love..._ ” Finally Max jogged through the now open door, and he watched as law enforcement encroached. “ _Love is all you need_.”  
          Sadie and Prudence had run ahead of them. “ _Love, love, love_ ,” they sang softly, holding their hands up to put a barrier between them and Jude. “ _Love, love, love._ ” Max stared at the scene, struck by their bravery. The men were reluctant to nod their heads in surrender.  
          “Plug it in!” he heard. Max whipped his head forward, seeing Jojo jogging towards his guitar to pick it up from the roof. It astounded him at the quick actions and effort everyone was putting forth to help Jude get his voice heard. With “proper” permissions now, Sadie had been free to return to the microphone beside Jude's, and she chimed in easily with him. Music started to surround them all, and again Max was at a loss. His plan was not working out the way he wanted. It was working out better than he wanted.  
          “ _All you need is love,_ ” everyone continued to sing.  
          Looking around once more, Max's eyes caught something strange. Piecing it together, his jaw fell open. Jude had glanced over long enough to notice his friend's distant gaze. When they made brief eye contact, Max nodded his head towards what he saw.  
          Jude turned his whole body, and he stood still and straight for a long time.  
          Lucy stood on the rooftop of the next building over, gazing with longing at the scene she saw.  
          Max, still flabbergasted by it all, could only continue to stare. But after a few quick breaths he could at last pitch his voice into the song. “ _She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah!_ ” His voice was nearly shrill with excitement, “ _She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah!_ ”  
          And behind Max and Jude the rest of the gang sang their last lyric. “ _Love is all you need!_ ”

 


	6. Dizzy Miss Lizzy

          Within the week everyone had moved back into the apartment. Though some of them could have had a “better” living space if they wanted, they all agreed that the apartment was home. Things were back to normal. Jude's drawings had once again began to occupy the walls, and colors had started to make their way into the dwelling. Upon first “inspection,” Sadie had even decided to replace the telephone that Max had broken. No one bothered to ask him why he'd done it. He was Max, after all.  
          But now Max had been met with temptations. Seeing Lucy and Jude constantly at each other's side had made him miss the warm feel of his girl pressed against him. That was the troubling thing, he discovered through the past couple of weeks, with committed relationships. Once he had been in one, it almost felt strange to pick up a random girl from the bar the same way he used to.  
          He would stare at the phone occasionally. With everyone paired off he was always left to his own devices. As much as he had hoped all his troubles would vanish after Jude's return, there were still a few lingering demons.  
          The loud ring startled Max. But he stayed still.  
          It took five rings for Sadie to finally give an annoyed shout of “Is someone gonna get that?”  
          Hesitantly, Max picked up the phone. “Hello?”  
          “So first you don't show up to the interview,” came a deep voice, “and then you don't call to apologize? Come on, Maxwell, it's been a _week._ I thought you would have said sorry a lot sooner than that! And don't you know Peter's been worried sick about you?”  
          “Jesus, Marcus!”  
          “Don't you 'Jesus, Marcus' me, Maxwell; you better start explaining yourself.”  
          Max was reminded of his drill sergeant in basic training. “Okay, okay. I had to go pick Jude up. And then everything went crazy and... I don't know, I just got lost in the clouds for a minute, man, I'm sorry. Everyone's been moving back in and it's just been...well, crazy, like I said.”  
          “Oh. So is everything going okay with that?” Surprisingly he didn't sound sarcastic.  
          “Uh...yeah, I guess.”  
          “Good, good.” Marcus sounded truly happy. That moment passed quickly. “But that doesn't mean you're off the hook with me.”  
          “I know, I know,” Max gave in, leaning against the wall from where he had sat himself down on the floor. It was almost as though he was being scolded by his father, but he couldn't be resentful towards Marcus. Max had screwed up pretty bad this time. “But I'll make it better. Is there any way she can still do it? I...I'll see if I can talk Petey into coming, too! You know what they say: two vets are better than one!”  
          The tension lifted entirely from his shoulders when Marcus's signature laugh echoed through the receiver. “Well good luck with that last part, but you know it's funny you should mention that. I think Elizabeth's calmed down enough to agree to another day. She's still got a little bit longer until the article's due. In fact I bet she'll be relieved.”  
          “Is that Max?” he heard a small voice on Marcus's end. There was the noise of a tiny struggle before the voice spoke into his ear at full blast. “Hey, bastard! You've still got my shirt!”  
          “Oh, ah, hey Carol! I...I didn't know.”  
          “Yeah, well now you do. I want it back!”  
          This time Marcus's laugh was a bit awkward, but he bounced back nonetheless. “She's just trying to find things to complain about recently. Anyway, now that I think about it, you and Peter can come over tonight if you want. If he's willing at all, maybe he'll feel a little more comfortable with his friends around.”  
          “Yeah, but it sounds like you might want to give Carol an excuse to leave. Between you and me I have no idea what shirt she's talking about; she might just rip my head off. I'm sure Petey would hate...to see...” Marcus wouldn't know why, but Max had quickly abandoned the sentiment and moved away from it. “We'll be there. But I can't promise he'll want to answer any questions.”  
          “That's cool, that's cool. Oh, and Maxwell?”  
          “Yeah, Mark?”  
          “Don't forget this time, damn!” Max only replied with laughter as he hung up the phone.

 

✼✌✼

 

          “Max!” Peter's voice was nothing short of jovial. For once he actually stood and made a beeline towards him, happily and briefly hugging his friend. Max returned it without hesitation.  
          “Petey! This is Jude!”  
          Peter had just finished smoothing his shirt when he looked up at the new arrival. “Jude! It's nice to finally meet you!” He extended his hand out promptly.  
          Jude smiled, “You must be Peter. It's nice to finally meet you too!” His handshake was met, and the gentlemen lead themselves to the bar stools that beckoned them.  
          “Max has told me all about you. I've gotta say, I think it's great you could come back to the states.”  
          “Yeah, it's not too bad, is it? Max has told me a lot about you, too, you know?”  
          Peter was intrigued and embarrassed, “Did he? Nothing too bad I hope.”  
          “Surprisingly, only good things!”  
          “By the way, Petey,” Max chimed in from where he sat between them, “Marcus called me earlier.”  
          “Oh, yeah, you forgot to go to that interview, didn't you?”  
          “Interview?” Jude sounded interested, “Do they do articles on taxi-cab drivers now?” While Max had appreciated the good-natured teasing, it struck him that he had yet to tell Jude straight-out about his little “problem.”  
          “No, she was going to interview him about the war.”  
          “Ah, Petey,” he attempted to silence him.  
          “It's okay, Max,” Jude gently shoved himself into his friend's shoulder. That was all Max needed to hear. Of course Jude would know. And of course he would understand. Sometimes there were no words Max could use to describe how much he appreciated him.  
          “And speaking of that, I have a favor to ask.”  
          “Oh no,” Peter shrank back somewhat, “that's never a good thing to hear from you.”  
          “Feel free to say no, but I was wondering if you might want to get interviewed _with_ me. Mark said we could stop by his place tonight and hang out. I didn't promise him anything, but,”  
          “Okay!”  
          “What?”  
          “Okay, I'll do it!”  
          “Really?” Max was certainly surprised.  
          “If it'll help you, I'll do it! Will you be there, Jude?” He leaned over the counter to smile at him.  
          “Not tonight. I've got to go meet Lucy downtown later on.”  
          “That's a shame! But you and me will still have fun, right, Max?”  
          Everything was coming together again. “Yeah we will!” He grabbed his glass and lifted it into the air. “Gentlemen! A toast...to two great friends who can always manage to pull me out of the deepest shit!”  
          “Cheers!” Jude and Peter piped up loudly from either side, bringing their own glasses to clank harshly against Max's.

 

✼✌✼

 

 

          The sun had set not too long ago. In its wake it had left the soft chirp of crickets and a few shimmering stars. Two sets of shoes scuffed softly at the concrete sidewalk in a slow rhythm. A sign illuminated the side of the towering brick building. Through the double doors was a a drab lobby, not too different from Max's own apartment building.  
          “Room 206, I think he said.”  
          “Oh, good, it's only on the second floor. I've climbed almost enough stairs for one night.”  
          “Are you sure you wanna do this? You really don't have to, you know.”  
          “I do want to!” They chattered idly as they ascended towards their destination. “I was really happy when you opened up in therapy a few weeks ago. So, hey, why can't I do it too?”  
          “That's awesome, Petey. You're awesome.”  
          Peter stayed quiet, smiling down at his shoes up the last few steps. Laughter slipped from the cracks of the door. Max noted the scratched gold plate reading “206” before he knocked. Although it died down, the laughter didn't cease, and soon the door had been opened.  
          “Come on in, come on in! Peter, it's wonderful as always to see you!”  
          “What about me?” Max mimicked sadness.  
          “And Maxwell, you...you _did_ manage to remember this time!” came the friendly retort. In an instant their jovial ruckus emerged with that of the three women who were sprawled out on the main room's floor. The bright rugs under them made them feel distant. They continued to giggle amongst themselves, watching the men that walked into the place.  
          “Carol. Faith.” Max greeted them both with short, hesitant nods. Oddly enough they had both appeared happy enough to see him – happy enough to keep laughing at least. When his eyes rested on the last girl, however, he felt a pang of something run through him. She was the only one who had managed to grow serious...or maybe shocked? She certainly wasn't laughing anymore.  
          “You must be Elizabeth,” Max stayed polite despite his new odd feeling.  
          “I am,” she managed. “I'm...I'm guessing you're Maxwell?”  
          “That's me, yeah...” Max was fighting to put a name to the awkward tension that grew too quickly between them.  
          “Nice to meet you,” she finally flashed a smile. “And you're Peter?”  
          “Yeah...” There was a sudden disturbance that Max felt at the sound of his friend's voice. He had grown quiet once more, and probably shy. In an attempt to make him feel a little bit more comfortable, Max pushed all the tension from around them.  
          He threw his arms around Peter's shoulders, “Who's smoking? Can we join in?”  
          Carol and Faith both cascaded into a giggle fit and raised their hands into the air from where they still lie on the colorful rugs.  
          “Did you guys want to get the interview out of the way first?” Marcus suggested.  
          “Uh...yeah! Petey, you up for it?”  
          “...I don't know.”  
          “That's okay! You can hang out here with Marcus. If you change your mind I'll be in...?” He looked over at Elizabeth, waiting for her to fill in the sentence. A quick flash of surprise went through him when he was immediately met with her bright green eyes. The way that she looked at him had left him struck. Had she been staring at him?  
          “The... Marcus, your bedroom is pretty quiet; is it okay if we go in there?”  
          “Sure, sure.”  
          “Groovy. Let me just grab my notebook.” Elizabeth dismissed herself in no time.  
          “Are you gonna be okay out here?” Max gently shook Peter.  
          He looked over at Marcus and smiled, “Yeah, I'll be okay.”  
          “ _Groovy_ ,” Max teased the woman behind her back, to which Peter gave a delighted snicker.

 

 

✼✌✼

 

          It had been several months since Max had walked through the halls of that apartment. Carol and Faith had made an interesting time for him before he was shipped off to Vietnam. He knew how lucky he was that they were both stoned out of their minds, otherwise they might just have taken turns beating the shit out of him. But...what about Elizabeth? His mind ached as though he were trying to remember something. But so many of his own memories from short term and long term both had been virtually erased. Still, he couldn't manage to fight the feeling that told him he _should be_ remembering _something_.  
          “I'm in here!” came her light voice. She must have heard him approaching from down the hall.  
          “So...” Max strode into the room, “Who gets to be on top?”  
          His bold tease must have caught her off guard, but she laughed quickly, “You wish, sir! The only thing anyone's going to be getting _on top_ of is finishing this article which _would_ have been early if not for a certain _interviewee_.” While he could tell she sincerely meant the words she said, he also appreciated the friendliness kept in her voice.  
          “I know, I know. I swear, between you and Marcus this thing was going to get done even if I had to go in kicking and screaming.”  
          “You got that right!” Max was amused at how quickly she had picked up on some of Marcus's mannerisms. “So...Maxwell...Let's go ahead and get this out of the way so we can go back out there. I'm dying for a smoke break.”  
          “I can sympathize with that sentiment.” For a moment he became preoccupied with pulling a cigarette from the pack in his pocket. Pulling it into the corner of his mouth and holding it there, he thought to ask “Does Marcus care if I...?”  
          Elizabeth shrugged, “I guess not.”  
          He held the cigarette through clenched teeth as he grinned. “I think I like you, Elizabeth. You want one?”  
          “No thanks; I don't smoke those.”  
          “Oh, so you meant _another_ kind of smoke break, eh? Okay, Elizabeth, I _know_ I like you.”  
          “Great! You're going to have to if you want to answer some of these questions.”  
          “Yeah, yeah, but try to take it easy on a poor guy, huh?”  
          “No promises,” she smiled. Max sat himself a respectable distance from her on the bed and lit his cigarette.  
          “Ready when you are.”  
          “Okay. First question! So, Maxwell, what made you decide to join the military?”  
          “I didn't,” he spoke casually, blowing a cloud of smoke into the air. He slouched forward, resting his free palm against his thigh, bowing his elbow out and away from himself. “I was drafted.”  
          Immediately she set to writing his response. It reminded Max of his psychiatrist, and he wasn't sure if he minded that or not. “What was the induction process like for you?”  
          “Synchronized, robotic hell.” The vivid memory danced in his mind.  
          She let out a small chuckle, “Not very descriptive, are you?”  
          “I try not to be,” was his quick retort. He had decided; he didn't like her transcribing his thoughts. Why had he even agreed to do this? Oddly she looked hurt at the sudden change in his voice. He wanted to apologize, but she beat him to it.  
          “I'm sorry... I'm curious. What did you say your last name was, again? Marcus never mentioned it.”  
          “Oh...” It was the first question that had tripped him up, possibly because it seemed a bit out of left field compared to the last two. “I didn't say. It's--”  
          “Maxwell?” Marcus knocked softly against the open door. “I think Peter wants to join in if that's okay?”  
          Elizabeth gazed at Max for a moment longer before nodding and beckoning him. “Of course! Come on in, Peter, we were just getting started!”  
          “Is it okay if Marcus stays?” Peter's voice was more friendly than when he had first arrived, but it still held an understandable insecurity.  
          “Sure!” Elizabeth was quick to reply. “Hey, Marcus, shut the door behind you. I don't think Carol and Faith are listening anyways, but you know it's hard to tell with those two sometimes.” With a natural laugh and a nod he did indeed close the door.  
          For a few moments after they all sat in the floor, they stayed quiet.  
          “...So...what do you want me to talk about...?” It came as a shock to them that Peter was the first to speak.  
          Elizabeth didn't draw too much attention to that fact. She lifted her notebook and pencil once more and was sure to be polite in her questioning. “What made you decide to join the military, Peter?”  
          She was met with a pleasant smile, “I wanted to do my part to help our country. Knowing that my actions were going to protect my family and friends at home was pretty nice, too.”  
          “Well let me go ahead and thank you for that,” Elizabeth had taken a moment to look up from her notebook, but her hands stayed steadily writing.  
          “You're welcome!”  
          “What was the induction process like for you?”  
          “...Pretty normal, I guess. Cubicles...peeing in a cup...conveyor belts. You know, the usual kind of stuff.”  
          Elizabeth gave a nod and continued to write. “You're kinda young to be a war vet, aren't you? Mind if I ask what happened?”  
          “Honorable discharge.” was Peter's quick reply.  
          “Very honorable indeed. Do you sometimes feel as though your time in Vietnam has affected you on a deep level?” When she looked up from her notepad, Elizabeth was instantly unsettled by the distant stare that had overcome Peter's once sparkling eyes.  
          “...Petey?” Max leaned forward and gently patted at his leg.  
          “I have flashbacks a lot,” his voice was just as dead as his gaze. Out of the corner of his eye Max could see that Elizabeth was still writing. He frowned, but continued his attempts to draw his friend from the dark place he was quickly receding into. “Everyone calls it 'shell shock,'” Peter drawled on, “and sometimes I can see flashbacks from... I can hear the bombs, and...see the blood...” Still Elizabeth wrote. “And I can see my friend...”  
          “Hey, Petey,” Max cooed. It was to no avail.  
          “They kept me there and held me down. They made me watch.”  
          “Pete... Petey, come on, man, you don't have to talk about this.”  
          “And they got out a knife and cut his neck...but they didn't stop. They didn't stop until his head came off.”  
          Elizabeth stopped writing.  
          Peter's shoulders began to heave up and down. His guttural sobs dismissed the eerie feeling the air had held only moments ago. Max pushed himself closer to his friend and enveloped him in a tight hug. Marcus followed suit in a heartbeat, leaving Elizabeth to stare dazed at them all. Peter's muffled cries pulled them all into a heavy reality where they stayed for a long, long time. Finally Peter was calm once more. He dragged his forearms across his face, wiping his tears away.  
          “I'm sorry I asked,” Elizabeth sounded surprisingly sincere.  
          Peter shook his head, “No, no, it's okay. I have to let it out every now again. That's what's gonna make me strong like Max.” At the mention of his name, his heart thudded. If only he knew. But a small blush did enter his cheeks, especially when he noticed the look Elizabeth had given him.  
          “Is it okay if I ask you one more question?” She set her notebook down on the floor and leaned towards Peter to give him her full attention.  
          “Okay!”  
          Max stared at Elizabeth through squinted, judging eyes.  
          “...Are you hungry? Marcus always forgets to offer snacks at these little get-togethers.”  
          Peter gave her a gob-struck, unbelieving smile.  
          “Well? Faith just got done making her famous 'make you slap a baby' spaghetti!”  
          “I do like spaghetti!”  
          “Enough to slap a baby?”  
          “...I'll be the judge of that!” Elizabeth laughed easily at Peter's response, and she rocked back and forth for a moment.  
          “You're too funny, Peter!”  
          “...You can call me Petey if you want.” He picked at his shoes as he spoke.  
          “Okay, Petey! Marcus is gonna show you where the kitchen is.” Peter nodded and held his smile while Marcus helped him to his feet. Once the two of them left, Elizabeth started to gather her things.  
          “Hey,” Max stopped her with his sudden interjection.  
          “Hey!” Her friendly smile struck him again.  
          “Thanks...”  
          “For what?” With a wink Elizabeth stood to her feet. She arched her back and lifted her arms into a stretch. “Let's go get some baby-slap spaghetti. I'm starving.” Max looked at the soft, small hand she had extended out towards him. He grabbed hold and stood to his feet with her polite assistance.  
          “Is that really what Faith calls it? I don't remember that particular item on her _ever-expanding_ menu.”  
          “...Okay, you caught me! I made it up! I thought it sounded funny enough, though.” Max took a moment to lift an eyebrow at her and give her a smirk. He held her gaze for a moment before she finally, quickly looked down. “Hey, um...” he listened carefully to her voice which had suddenly grown soft. “What is your last name anyway?”  
          “Carrigan,” he spoke without hesitation this time, and he watched her reaction closely: she took in a short, sharp breath and her glossy lips spread into an ecstatic smile.  
          “I knew it! I knew it was you, Max! It's me, Lizzy! Lizzy Rigby!”  
          Suddenly he remembered.

 


	7. I Saw Her Standing There

          “Alright students. Let's all settle down now.” The prim woman who stood in front of the classroom set down the chalk she had been holding. She dusted her hands onto her long dress before she adjusted her glasses and continued on, “As you all know, it's getting to be that time of year again.” A few girls in the front of the classroom had already started to giggle and whisper among themselves. With a quick leer from the teacher, however, they calmed down. “Prom will be this upcoming Friday. So gentlemen, you'd better start asking these lovely young women as soon as possible! Someone may just beat you to it.”  
          The bell rang, and they all scrambled to get their books together. Max tapped his heel against the floor and looked around nervously as his peers left him nearly alone. The teacher had gone back to her desk already, leaving just herself, Max, and another student towards the front of the room. Just like every day since the beginning of school, she had waited and stayed behind for him. Her friendly smile pulled him from his seat, and he tried to force his own.  
          “So, Lizzy...”  
          It had been two weeks since whispers of prom spread through the student body. And it had also been two weeks since Lizzy had given him the terrible news: She was moving. Before too long she'd be halfway across the country in Texas. Of course, it wasn't anything she could help. For that matter, it wasn't anything that any of her family could help. Her father had been stationed in Ft. Bliss to continue his active duty in the military. That was just the way it had to be.  
          But in those two weeks Max had come to all kinds of crazy realizations and did a lot of soul searching by way of smoking several cigarettes behind his family home. Being eighteen was so difficult. Unforeseen circumstances were taking one of his closest friends far, far away from him. Yet only over the course of the past so many months did he really try to figure out what she meant to him. So when the news came through Lizzy's shaken voice, he was upset. Remembering the way his heart sunk into his belly brought the sensation to him once more.  
          “I was wondering.” The pair of them left the classroom and slipped into the sea of students clamoring for the front doors of the school. The end of the day was always chaos.  
          “Oh, no! We've got a free thinker!” Max laughed at the joke, sending his disheveled papers amidst his text books just a bit more askew. “Careful!” In contrast, Lizzy's books were neat enough to allow her a free hand to push a book back closer to the boy's chest before it fell to the ground.  
          Usually Max wasn't this nervous. “Thanks...”  
          “What is it you were wondering?”  
          He pushed out a shaky sigh when they passed through the double doors and into the open air. The walk back to their houses was a short one, but Max and Lizzy always had enjoyed the bit of time they had to themselves. Anticipating the stroll, Max thought to give himself some time to calm his nerves.  
          “Did you want to come over for dinner tonight?”  
          “...It is meatloaf night, isn't it?” Truthfully, Lizzy had been at the Carrigan house for dinner more times than her own. Their structured home life was something that she had always found pleasant.  
          “Yep!” Max was graced with Lizzy's gentle smile once more. He couldn't hold eye contact very long before he had to force his gaze to the ground. But he did manage to look back up at her. “I was wondering about something else, though.”  
          “Well quit teasing me like that, then!” She pushed out a laugh and slapped at his shoulder. “What is it you wanna know so bad?”  
          “Do you wanna go to prom with me?”  
          Lizzy halted so suddenly that Max had to awkwardly stop himself short, sending the small book at the top of his pile down onto the pale concrete below. But Max didn't dare to move. He watched Lizzy intensely. Her head slumped down and her chin fell against her heaving chest.  
          “Max, I...” her voice cracked. His chest fluttered. “My dad already told me I can't go.”  
          He tried to cover his disappointment. “Oh! Oh, uh, that's okay!” Max scrambled awkwardly for his book and stood upright. “I mean I was just wondering, anyways. I couldn't really think of anyone else to ask, so...” The sentence stayed fragmented around them, and Max felt so awkward he wondered if it was possible to get sick from it.  
          “I'm sorry,” Lizzy told him when she continued to walk, “I asked him last week if we would still be here, and he was all 'Just barely.'” She must have started to feel awkward too, Max noted. She only sounded flustered when she was shoved into an odd situation. He knew her too well. “I don't know what he meant by that, but...” Another fragmented sentiment broke off into the air.  
          “But I did ask you before anyone else, didn't I?” Max tried to instill their usual humorous atmosphere.  
          “You did! I'm surprised! And you know I would have said yes!”  
          “Yeah?” butterflies fluttered listlessly in his belly.  
          “Yes,” she drew out the word, “why wouldn't I?”  
          “I dunno...” He looked down, suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed. “...When are you guys leaving?”  
          “Sometime next week,” it appeared as though Lizzy was glad for the change in conversation. “But Dad still doesn't know exactly when.”  
          “But you'll say bye to everyone before then, right?”  
          “Of course! I wouldn't just leave without a word! You know I have a flair for the dramatic!” She struck a flamboyant pose as she said this, and Max smiled and nodded. “Hey, listen,” she spoke quickly as they grew closer to their houses, “I've got to go to my house really quick, but I'll be back over in time for dinner, okay?”  
          “Okay. Sounds good.” Max watched after her as she peered cautiously to her left and right before jogging across the street. Her skirt swayed along with her hips. With a nervous gulp the boy brought his eyes back up and saw her the rest of the way into her house.

 

✼✌✼

 

          “Don't be ridiculous, Max. You only get _one_ senior prom; of course you're going.”  
          “I just don't want to, Mom, is that so terrible?”  
          “You'll only regret it if you don't.”  
          Lucy pushed her tiny face into the doorway, “You're lucky! I have to wait four more years before _my_ senior prom!”  
          Max scrunched up his face, playfully mocking the girl. She did the same and darted off, leaving Max to glare up at his mother once more. “There's no point.”  
          “You know I don't like to bring these things up, but your father bought you a very nice suit to wear. It would be a shame if his gesture went to waste.”  
          “Yeah, well, I didn't _ask_ him to buy it for me!”  
          “You didn't have to, Maxwell. But you _do_ have to go. Come on, get ready. You'll be late.”  
          “Mom, I'm not going!”  
          Suddenly her gaze struck fear into him. “Either you go to that dance, or you're _going_ to be grounded for a _very_ long time.”  
          “...I don't care,” Max retorted through a mutter. He lowered himself to mere pouting, and all the dissent left his voice. “You can just go ahead and ground me forever.” His eyes shot angrily down to his bed when he heard her soft footsteps approaching him. The bed springs gave a slight squeak when she sat down. Her comforting touch on his back made tears spring to his eyes almost immediately.  
          “I know you're sad that Lizzy's leaving. We all are, Max. But you shouldn't hole yourself away in your room because of it. Your...fiendish little friends will be there, and they'll miss you if you don't show up. If you go, I promise you'll have a nice time.”  
          “...Okay...” he gave a shaky sigh of surrender. “But don't let me to forget to stop at the liquor store first,” he pushed through a cheeky smile. His mother didn't say anything; she only laughed and pulled him into a hug. As he watched her leave the room, the thought struck him that maybe his parents weren't so bad after all.

  
          Lucy watched her brother as he adjusted his blue bow-tie. He stood by the front door, their parents flanking him on either side and fussing over him.  
          “Don't forget to be polite to the girls,” Mom chimed, straightening his hair.  
          “Yes, and Max, don't spike _everyone's_ punch for Christ's sake.” Dad stood with his arms loosely crossed over his chest.  
          “I got it, I got it,” Max gently swatted his mother's hand away.  
          “And don't forget,” Lucy's voice drew his attention, “just because all the girls reject a dance from you, that _doesn't_ make you a bad person!”  
          “Oh, _nice_ , Luc,” Max grinned, “that _quick wit_ of yours is really gonna take you places!”  
          She stuck her tongue out at him, and he returned the gesture in earnest. Turning back towards his parents, Max gave a small wave. “Alright, I'm outta here.”  
          “Be safe, Max,” his mother's voice reached out to him as he stepped out the door. He gave her a small nod over his shoulder and shoved his hands into his suit-pants pockets. Once he heard the door close behind him, he figured he was safe enough to give a sorry gaze up to Lizzy's house. Her bedroom window was lit up, and shadows danced in front of the curtains. They were probably busy packing. He decided against stopping by before he left. After all, he'd see her again, wouldn't he? She promised she would say goodbye.  
          Max pulled his car door closed and pushed his key into the ignition, but didn't immediately turn it. Instead he gave a last look to her bedroom window. Still the shadows moved rapidly around. Pulling his attention back down into his car, he gave his wrist a quick twist. He cast his sights ahead on the road, but something fluttered in the corner of his eye. Looking up once more, Max saw that the shadows had stopped. And then, the curtains parted. A heat flash surged through him when Lizzy's gaze snapped straight to his own. Having already been caught red-handed being the “creepy” guy, Max went ahead and waved up at her. He wished he hadn't. The curtains fell quickly back together, and the shadows started to move again. Max muttered a quick, “God damn it” to himself before pulling into the street.

 

✼✌✼

 

          His friends had indeed been glad to see him. Of course the majority of them didn't have dates of their own, and the ones that did got heavily but very playfully teased. But they had made a tight-knit group over to the back of the gymnasium, by the punch bowl and the door that lead out to the football field. Three times already they had been scolded for putting alcohol into the other students' drinks, and three times already they had lied and said they didn't do it.  
          Max ducked his flask back into his pocket as the principal approached with a glowering stare. His blue eyes grew large with guilt. “Take this,” the man loomed over the drinks, and picked up the cup he had witnessed Max pouring something into, “and get _away_ from the table. I don't want to see you boys over here again.”  
          Hesitantly, Max took the cup that was pushed towards him. His friends gave fiendish snickers while they pulled him away, back over to where other students had lined up against the wall. Pressing the paper cup to his lips, Max tilted his head back and downed the drink.  
          “God, I put a lot in that one,” he rasped. “Alright, I'm gonna go take a leak.” He tossed the cup into the trash and parted from them.  
          “Max, the bathroom's that way!” one of his friends called over the music.  
          “But the back door's _right there_ ,” he pointed dramatically at it and kept walking. “Besides, everyone's got to step in some piss once in their life. At least only the meat-heads will step in mine.”  
          Having relieved himself, Max buttoned his pants up and pulled a cigarette and a lighter from the inside of his black tuxedo jacket. He kicked his shiny dress shoes at the grass and dug the pointy toe into the dirt. The boy was sure his father would be livid if he was watching. And then, with a laugh, he lit his cigarette. Which one would he be more upset about, he wondered. Quick to finish it off, Max took quick drags, blowing the smoke out through his nostrils in a quick and swift stream.  
          “Max!” He sputtered out a cough as his friend jumped out and shouted his name.  
          “You're a bastard!” Max laughed and choked, his eyes, nose, and throat all stinging.  
          “Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?”  
          “No, but I can kiss _your_ mother with this mouth.”  
          “What about Lizzy?”  
          He snapped almost too quickly, “What _about_ her?”  
          “Check it out,” his friend coaxed, waving him back towards the door. Max gave a few more coughs as he flicked his cigarette away and shoved his lighter back into his jacket. Hurried footsteps brought him towards the door, and he peered in with his eyes flicking back and forth.  
          By the front door there were a few girlish, delighted shrieks. He stared at the scene for a while, and his heart skipped a good two or three beats when the girls had parted to reveal her: Lizzy had curled her dark brown hair into tight, silky ringlets. Her simple mascara was a change from the natural look she often wore, but it made her green eyes sparkle from clear across the room. The yellow fabric of her dress clung tightly to her torso, held up only by thin straps, and it flared out at her hips. White stockings graced her smooth legs, and were covered at the ends by shiny black Mary Janes. Pulling his attention back up to her face, he was struck by a sudden thought: she was perfect. But more importantly, she was _there_.  
          Her friends still held the girl's attention, and she had not looked away from them yet.  
          The roughhousing started quickly. Max could only chuckle as his friends began to nudge and poke him from all different directions. Soon a voice came through the loudspeakers and gained everyone's attention.  
          “Alright, cool cats and cute chicks! Grab yourself a partner and make a beeline for the dance floor. This next one's a real body-mover! _One, two, three, four!_ ”  
          When the guitar kicked in, students crisscrossed each other from all sides of the gym.  
          Max was quick to sing to the music: “ _Well she was just seventeen,_ ” he stepped in time to the music with his friends, “ _you know what I mean._ ” They split off from him in two or three short steps, tugged away by several young women, leaving him to walk alone. But his sights stayed fixed to Lizzy, “ _And the way she looked was way beyond compare. So how could I dance with another? Oh--_ ”  
          Dipping neatly in front of him, a young woman placed her hands on his shoulders and began to sway. Politely, Max excused himself and tugged away from her, and after what felt like far too long, he was free to gaze back across the room, “ _When I saw her standing there._ ” Unaware and uncaring of the pouting girl he had left in his wake, he pushed on. Finally, Lizzy looked over, and her eyes fell upon him, somehow sparkling even brighter than before. “ _Well she looked at me, and I, I could see,_ ” a few couples danced in front of him, blocking his path. But he noticed that Lizzy stared after him with a worried face. His tune became rather reflective, “ _that before too long I'd fall in love with her._ ” Much to his dismay, she looked away, and he easily spotted the boy that had distracted her. Max couldn't hear him over the music, but he knew just what he was asking her. “ _She wouldn't dance with another..._ ” His lyric was cast hopefully out across the room. Lizzy shook her head at the boy with a polite smile. “ _Woo!_ ” Max gave a triumphant cry and pushed his fist into the air, “ _When I saw her standing there!_ ”  
          Suddenly there was a great divide in the teens that danced to the fast music. A clear path was formed between Max and Lizzy, and he continued to sing as he walked to her. “ _Well my heart went boom when I crossed that room._ ” Now he stood before her. Breathless and wordless both, he was only able to extend his hand. Tingles raced through him as she placed her own tiny hand into his. “ _And I held her hand in mine..._ ” Max drew the note out, and he raised his pitch and his spirits both as he pulled her out onto the dance floor. He drew the note out longer still, pressing his hands onto her hips. The room felt as though it were spinning, and time passed too quickly.

          “ _Whoa, we danced through the night._ ” The couples had dwindled down further and further along with the music. Only the slow pluck of a guitar and a soft piano accompanied them. They swayed slowly, and Max pulled her in close. “ _And we held each other tight,_ ” came his somber voice. Lizzy rested her forehead softly onto Max's chest, making a jolt course through him. “ _And before too long, I fell in love with her..._ ”  
          Oblivious to his sentiment, Lizzy was quick to straighten herself out, and Max noticed the rosy blush she held in her cheeks. When their eyes met she crinkled her nose into a silent laugh and poked the tip of her tongue through her teeth. She stepped back just an inch and began to wiggle her hips in a goofy way, something of a half-cocked twist. With an excited smile Max was suddenly her best friend again, and they laughed as they tried to out-dance one another.  
          “ _Now I'll never dance with another!_ ” Max continued to sing. Lizzy attempted to do a daring spin and somehow managed to gracefully land on her rear. “ _Woo!_ ” Max encouraged her and lifted her up to her feet. Their eyes met for a moment and she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “ _Since I saw her standing there..._ ”  
          “Let's go outside,” Lizzy sounded a bit embarrassed, glancing around at the few other students who remained. Max only nodded, and she was quick to take his hand and tug him towards the back door.  
          “ _Well my heart went boom when I crossed that room,_ ” he gazed down at their cupped hands, “ _And I held her hand in mine..._ ” Again he held the note, singing it out until they finally stood out in the crisp night air.  
          “Oh! I forgot my purse! Stay here.”  
          Max watched her as she left. “ _Whoa, we danced through the night._ ” The music was a mere background melody now. “ _And we held each other tight,_ ” back towards the front of the auditorium, Lizzy was hugging her friends and waving to them, “ _And before too long I fell in love with her. Now I'll never dance with another..._ ” The thought fell upon him that she was probably saying bye to them all for the last time. “ _Woo~_ ” His tone was anything but happy, “ _Since I saw her standing there..._ ”  
          “Sorry about that.” Her sudden presence nearly surprised him, bringing him back to his senses.  
          “Don't worry about it.” He observed her once more and wondered how after a good hour or two of dancing she could look just as put-together as when she arrived. He felt like a sweaty mess in comparison.  
          “That was fun! You're not half bad!”  
          “Naw, you're just worse than me,” was Max's quick quip. He flinched away from the forceful shove that sent him a few inches back and into the chain-link fence behind him. She was quick to fling herself back and onto the fence, pressing her arm lightly against his. Her movements shook Max slightly and made a loud clanging noise. “Aren't you worried about your dress?” he sounded genuinely concerned.  
          “No,” came her flat reply, “it's not mine.”  
          A few loud chuckles were belted out by Max. Calming himself after a few short breaths he spoke aloud a question that had been stuck in his mind. “What are you doing here, anyway? I thought your dad wasn't gonna let you come.”  
          “Well usually whenever I throw myself to the ground and threaten to run off with you, they let me do just about anything.”  
          “Oh is _that_ so?” Max roughly nudged her a few inches to the side.  
          She giggled and pushed him back with her shoulder. “No, but I did have to use my 'outside voice' once or twice.”  
          “Scary.”  
          “No, but definitely effective.”  
          “Obviously! So...did you find out when you're leaving?”  
          Her bright smile faded quickly, and she cast her green eyes away from him. “Tomorrow morning. That's why I really had to fight to be here tonight. But I knew it would be worth it!” Again her voice grew warm. Max didn't have to look at her to know she was smiling once more.  
          He gripped the chain link behind him and squeezed it tightly. “Why's that?”  
          “There was a boy I really wanted to dance with.”  
          Max squeezed the fence a bit tighter, letting the metal dig softly into his fingers. “Did you get to dance with him?” Finally he found the courage to look up at Lizzy again.  
          “No,” she said through a small frown. Max felt dizzy. “Some _jerk_ hogged me all night.” Suddenly Max knew what the ball on a high striker must have felt like. Her laugh sent his heart skyrocketing up into his throat. Relief and an overwhelming happiness succumbed him. “But that's okay. He was pretty nice for a jerk.” He was at a loss for words. Was she flirting with him? He vividly remembered the first time he had been able to distinguish when she was flirting with other guys, and how much it fired him up when she did. “But his twist left a lot to be desired.”  
          Caught off guard at the sudden teasing, Max blurted out a quick, “Did you want a ride home?”  
          “Sure! Mom and Dad are probably asleep by now.” She leaned away from the fence and began to walk back towards the school. She stopped short at a soft squish underfoot. “...Is the ground _wet_ right here?” She asked.  
          Max's eyes went wide. “...I think...you just stepped in my piss.” He couldn't help it. His laughter slipped out in snickers but quickly became an unbridled cackle. Through his squinted eyes he could just see a smile spreading onto her pink lips.  
          “That's okay,” she piped up between her friend's laughs, “these shoes aren't mine either!”

 

✼✌✼

 

          The quick ride down the street had been a silent one so far. Only locusts and the fading music drifting from the school had interrupted from time to time. Lizzy kept her sights up at the sky, her green orbs showing the reflection of the full moon clearly. Max was glad that it was late at night; no other cars were on the road, so it didn't matter when he had accidentally drifted into the opposite lane after staring at the girl for just a bit too long. With a quick jerk he pulled back to the proper side of the road.  
          “Oh!” Lizzy giggled with unease, “You okay?”  
          “Yeah, I'm fine. Nothing a little more alcohol won't fix.”  
          “Are you holding out on me?” came her soft tease of a retort. She watched as a smirk appeared on his face and he pulled a flask out of his pocket before tossing it to her. With only a small fumble she caught it. “I didn't see you drinking tonight!” Lizzy exclaimed through a grin.  
          “That's because I didn't need to after you showed up.” Max spoke the words before he gave them much thought.  
          “Oh...” Try as he might to focus, the boy couldn't help but look over at her when her voice had faltered. She held a soft and content smile and stared down at the flask that now rested in her lap. Distracting himself from his sudden spell of dizziness, he looked back to the road. Just barely he missed Lizzy's smile fading, and her returning his deep gaze. She watched him for a long moment before flipping open the top of the flask and gulping down some of its contents, letting the alcohol burn its way down her throat. Her eyes returned forlornly the moon that still hung up in the sky. With a sudden pang of sadness she saw their houses in the corner of her vision growing closer and closer.  
          Max pulled up to Lizzy's home, stopping just in front of the driveway. The engine fell quiet when he turned it off, and silence swallowed them up once more. They both had their gazes set on anything but one another.  
          It was Lizzy that finally spoke. “I'll really miss you, Max.” She sounded so sad. It gave him a jump start, but he managed to stay still. He couldn't see her like this. And so he didn't look. Instead he fought to keep his eyes set on the world outside the windshield. “...And Lucy and your parents too,” she quickly added, unknowing that the addition fell on deaf ears. “Your family's been so kind to me... I don't think I'll ever be able to repay you guys.”  
          “I'll miss you too, Lizzy,” he finally managed from the haze he was in. The soft touch of her hand startled him and made him jump. His gaze whipped over to her, and his heart melted at the beautiful smile he saw, sullied only by the sad green eyes that accompanied it.  
          “Don't make me cry, you big idiot,” she tried to laugh. The hand that had rested softly on his shoulder was suddenly giving him a soft shove. “I know your mom taught you better than to make a girl _cry_.” Somehow Lizzy had managed to dismiss from her mind the fact that she had indeed been on the brink of tears. When she blinked, a few sorry droplets traced their way down her cheeks. But still she laughed, wiping them away with the back of her hand. “The next time I see you... I'll get you back for this!” Now her laughter was only what she could manage to push out through her quickening breaths. In a sudden movement she hid her face behind her hands as her shoulders began to fall up and down. Her strained cries filled Max's head and echoed there until he could fill his own eyes filling with tears.  
          “Lizzy...” he murmured, leaning over to pull her into a comforting embrace. Sure he had let her cry on his shoulder several times in the past, and it had pained him each and every time, but this was the only time he had ever been close to mourning with her. And as he realized that this was probably the last time he would ever see her, he began to cry too.  
          “Max!” Her weeping ceased almost instantly, and she slapped her small arms around his back. “It's okay!” He wasn't sure if she was pleading with him or herself, but he did convince himself to lean back just enough to stare into her eyes. “It's okay,” she repeated with a shaky voice and a genuine smile. “We'll see each other again someday, right? No need to be upset! ...It's not 'goodbye,'” she strained again quite suddenly, and again his brain was met with a numbing dizziness, “It's...'I'll see you later.'” He could tell that she believed that about as much as he did. But still she tried to be strong for him. “Okay?” she softly butted her forehead into his and then pulled him back into their tight hug. Max found himself squeezing her tightly and not wanting to ever let go.  
          Lizzy and Max embraced each other for several moments until Lizzy leaned away from him just a bit. The feeling of her smooth lips on his cheek made him blush, and for a moment he was glad that it was dark. Max was sure to try and remember everything he could about the green eyes that had looked at him with such affection. He didn't want to forget Lizzy's eyes for as long as he lived, especially when they shone with the innocent excitement only a crush could supply.  
          Finally she grabbed her purse and opened the car door. Max's cheek and heart both still tingled with his own bit of innocent excitement. He wondered if she felt the same burning sensation he did. When the car door shut, he jerked his attention back to her. She walked briskly around the front of his car, and Max was certain that he could see her smile even through the darkness. He saw her up the three steps onto her porch just as he had done every day since they started walking home together in middle school. But for the first time she hadn't just rushed in. Instead she turned and looked out across her yard. She brought her small hand up and gave him a wave. His brow arched in the middle and his lip began to quiver. Almost reluctantly he returned the gesture through his open window. Quietly, Lizzy opened the door to her home and stepped in. The door swung shut behind her.  
          He crossed his arms and rested them atop the steering wheel, slowly letting his forehead rest on them. Now his eyes were staring pitifully down at his lap and he heaved a broken sigh. He sat there for a while, unblinking and nearly breathless with the varying emotions sloshing through his head.  
          There was a light tapping noise.  
          Max looked towards the noise, and he held back a small sob when he saw Lizzy peeping through her curtains. “I'll see you later,” she mouthed the words so neatly.  
          He tried to hide his sudden choked crying with a cough and a sorry smile. Managing a nod, he watched as the curtains fell together. Suddenly his memory from earlier that evening crossed him. She must have been getting ready for prom. She must have been excited to see him leaving to go there. He gripped the steering wheel tightly with both hands until his knuckles turned white. It wasn't long until he had started his car and circled around to the other side of the street, in front of his own house.

 

✼✌✼

 

          There was no point in locking his doors. The only thing he really cared about at that moment was already gone as far as he was concerned. It was a real struggle to pull himself out of the car and trudge up the steps of his own house. His keys jangled loudly as he unlocked the door and stepped in. All the lights in the house were off, but Max had sneaked back in so many times that he knew by heart every step to make. It was nearly muscle memory for him. That was fortunate, too, as Max was not quite in the state to watch his step.  
          He hadn't bothered to turn the light on when he slumped into his bedroom. He couldn't even bother to kick off his shoes as he trudged over to his bed and let his body fall back onto it. Not even the loud squeak had been enough to stop him thinking about Lizzy. Her excited green eyes flashed into his vision for an instant, and his chest gave a melancholic heave.  
          Max wondered why his heart hurt so badly. He wondered why they had been brought together only to have been ripped apart. He wondered again if he had made her feel as crazy as she did him.  
          “ _I think I'm gonna be sad..._ ” went his sorrowful crooning into the too-quiet room. “ _I think it's today, yeah..._ ” His breaths began to come in rapidly. Tears started to sting into his eyes. “ _The girl that's driving me mad..is..._ ” it hurt him to sing past the lump that caught in his throat. “ _...Is going away._ ” He was reduced to a mere whisper at the realization. That time he had seen her in her window, trying so desperately to make him smile, was the last time he would ever see her. He knew it.

 


	8. This Boy

     “Lizzy Rigby…” The name he had not spoken in so long felt strange on his tongue.  
     “The beard and the hair threw me off,” she smiled and pulled him into a big hug. “What’s _your_ excuse, you salty old bastard?” But she didn’t give him time to answer. “I didn’t want to say anything, but I’m glad I did. I can’t believe you’re here in _New York_!”  
     Things began to click into place for him, and the gears started to turn once more. “Me? What the hell are _you_ doing here?” Max roughly slapped her back before giving her a tight squeeze and stepping away. “I mean…holy crap! It’s been what…seven _years_?”  
     “Yeah, but who’s been counting, right?”  
     “You look great,” he spoke casually, letting himself give her a once-over, “it’s a shame you’re not seventeen anymore.”  
     “The aging process is definitely bringing us all down. I mean, look at _you_!”  
     He didn’t hold back the grin that sprung from him. “Still the same sweet little Lizzy, I see.”  
     “I know you didn’t expect me to change too much. I guess even time couldn’t stop your bad influence.”  
     “Stop; you’re making me blush,” Max jabbed at her sides. Lizzy was quick to punch his arm. The two of them laughed and shoved each other around until Marcus walked back into the room.  
     “What’s going on in here?” his voice was pleasant and content.  
    “Check it!” Lizzy exclaimed, turning her whole body to face him and dramatically pointing at Max, “I knew him when I was a kid! We practically grew up together!” Max shoved his hands into his pants pockets and looked down with a slight prickling embarrassment.  
     “Is _that_ where you picked up all those nasty habits of yours?” Marcus adjusted his rose-colored glasses and leaned his shoulder against the door frame, putting a hand neatly on his bony hip.  
     “You got that right! Especially the drugs. And the ladies.” Max lifted an eyebrow at her last statement.  
     “Speaking of—“  
     “Lizzy!” Carol shouted from back in the living room, “If you don’t get your ass in here, there won’t be anything left for you!”  
     “Y-Yeah, we’re gonna eat everything in the kitchen!” came Peter’s hesitant but friendly yell. “So hurry it up!” The laughing Max heard from Carol, Faith, and even Peter put a smile on his face.  
     “Looks like Petey’s made some friends,” he remarked.  
     “ _Hungry_ friends – friends with the munchies,” Lizzy added. She gave one last, rough slap to Max’s shoulder before pushing past Marcus. Max was quick to follow her, but his brisk walk was stopped short when a large hand grabbed at the back of his jacket collar and gave an abrupt tug.  
     “Easy there. Carol and Faith are calming down for the night, and I think they forgot you were here.”  
     “What?” Max looked confused, and maybe a little hurt when he turned his glance away from Lizzy and onto Marcus, “Are you telling me to leave?”  
     “No,” Marcus was quick to smile, “but I _am_ telling you to watch out for flying dinner plates. Oh, and whatever they break over your head _you’ll_ have to clean up.”  
     “Even beer bottles?” he mimicked a pout.  
     “ _Especially_ beer bottles.”  
     “But the beer! And the glass! That’s dangerous!” A teasing, mischievous grin met the taller man's keen gaze.  
     “Maxwell, you better get out there!” Marcus shoved him and chuckled, following closely behind as he went down the hall. Raucous laughter awaited them both, tugging at them from within the kitchen now. Max's curiosity had been piqued, and so he didn't hesitate to gingerly lean his head into the doorway.  
     “You can do it, Petey!” came Lizzy’s friendly cheering.  
     Carol and Faith were quick to chime in. “Eat that meat!” they chanted in unison, “Eat that meat!”  
     “What the _hell_ do you guys have this poor man doing in here?” was Max’s query as he turned the rest of the corner and stood fully in the kitchen. His hands were shoved deep into his coat pockets. Peter was sat at the table with a very large portion of steak in front of him, and he was eyeing it with hunger. “Do you ever stop cooking, Faith?” Max gave her a peaceful smile. The redhead glowered up at him and stayed quiet amidst Lizzy and Carol’s continued shouts of support.  
     “I bet her twenty bucks I could eat this whole thing in fifteen minutes,” Peter pointed up over his shoulder to Faith with the fork he clutched between sweaty fingers. The small woman's cheeks grew a rosy red, and she beamed a smile down at her new friend.  
     “They don’t know how much you like to eat, do they?” Max stepped a bit closer to Lizzy with a polite smile. He wasn't sure if he would need her protection or not before the night was over with. “Shame on you, Petey! Hustling these poor women!”  
     “I’m not hustling them!” came his innocent, defensive cry of protest.  
     “I’m just teasing, man!” Max grinned, “Keep going!”  
     “ _Poor women_ , huh?” Carol shot Max an angered glance from across the table.  
     The man threw his hands up in surrender, “I didn’t mean it!”  
     “Max, you’re just _trying_ to get in trouble tonight, aren’t you?” an elbow nudged into his arched back. Lizzy’s voice struck him quite suddenly. It was still a bit of a shock to be in the same room as her again.  
     He recovered quickly while he pushed his hands back into his pockets, “I was put on this planet to get into trouble.”  
     “Clearly,” Faith sparked, matching Carol’s hostile stare.  
    A short “ahem” cut in between them. “I’m gonna go get my own little party started,” Lizzy pushed away the tension that began to cloud around them. “Anyone coming?”  
    “Aw, aren’t you gonna eat something?” Faith whined and reached out to grab onto Lizzy’s wrist. “I spent all day making food! You can’t just let it sit here!”  
   “I know,” Lizzy pulled her into a quick hug, “but I just want to smoke first. I’ll be in my room if anyone needs me.” With a bit of a friendly struggle she managed to pull away from the small woman and separate from the group. Max watched her hips swaying as she went down the hall, and he stared for so long that he leaned drastically back on his heels. Turning back to the others, his old ways had already forced a crooked and devilish smile onto his face. But he was only met with two cold stares and a confused one. Despite popular belief, Max was indeed capable of taking a hint.  
     Awkwardly he stepped out of the kitchen, walking backwards as though he didn’t feel quite safe enough to turn his back on the two women who had now seemed to form a protective wall around Peter. Carol’s arm was draped over the meager man’s shoulders, and Faith rested her hand on top of Carol’s.  
     “You gonna be okay in here?” Max asked his friend. Peter quickly nodded and grinned with a quick glance up at the ladies.  
     “I’m about to be twenty dollars richer!” Faith was the first to laugh at his jest, and she pulled his head softly into her chest for a warm embrace.  
     Deciding his friend was at least safer than he, Max pulled himself away from the trio. Passing Marcus on the way through the living room he gave him a small wave.  
     “Behave,” came Marcus’s cool voice from the couch.  
     “I’ll do my best,” Max gave him a wink and continued on down the hallway.

 

✼✌✼

 

     She sat on the windowsill, the cool breeze tousling her hair just slightly. He studied her for a moment from the doorway. A thick stream of smoke rose up into her nostrils, and she breathed it in for a long moment before puffing it all out. Perhaps sensing a presence, she turned to look over her shoulder. A surprised cough sent her sputtering.  
     “Max! Stop being such a creep!” She smiled through the small coughs that rose in her throat. “Haven’t I seen enough of you for one day?”  
     “Have you?” Max retorted playfully upon stepping further into her bedroom. Gazing around he saw a few multi-colored lava lamps that illuminated newspaper clippings, which had been neatly tacked onto the wall. Under the clippings were a tidy wooden desk and a bright red ashtray that caught his attention almost immediately. The walls were a bright green, blemished only by the odd purple heart or peace sign here and there.  
     “…No. Of course not,” he looked back to her just as she rolled her eyes and patted the spot next to her. “Come on, have a seat. Take a load off.” Gripped between her small thumb and forefinger was an inconspicuous white-papered joint, still burning at its tip. She held it out to him.  
     “I’m so disappointed in you, Lizzy,” Max purred, taking it from her without hesitation. Bringing it to his lips, he drew the acrid smoke into his lungs and held it in. Still holding his breath, Max sat himself next to the woman. As he passed the joint back to her he finally let out a steady exhale, only just tainted with smoke.  
     “First time for everything, huh?”  
     He looked confused, “It’s not my first time smoking.”  
     “No shit,” she grinned, “I meant that it was the first time we’re smoking _together_.”  
     “…So it is!” He had to search his memory briefly, but found indeed that no such event had taken place. “First time for everything…” Max reflected her earlier sentiment.  
     “Check it,” Lizzy patted his thigh two quick times. Turning away from the window, she took a large drag and put her mouth into a distinct “O” shape. Gently she began to push out near-opaque smoke rings.  
     “Damn, Lizzy! How long have _you_ been smoking?”  
     “Long enough,” she inhaled the rest of the smoke she'd taken in and passed back to Max.  
     About twenty minutes later, their loud guffawing and roughhousing had caused enough attention from the street below to earn an angered, “Keep it down up there!” Of course, they only laughed in reply and began to simultaneously shush each other. Their foreheads touched and they stared into each other's eyes, snickering still. Lizzy haphazardly tossed her limp arms around the man and leaned far over back into the bedroom. They fell, making a soft thud on the floor, and still she held tightly to him. Snickers became raucous laughter once again.  
     Eventually the woman let her friend go and rolled onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. Suddenly she stopped giggling and grew very quiet. Her eyes became wide in an instant. “Whoa...”  
     Max was able to draw his gaze away. The room had become dark along with the outside world, and so he was struck when he took in the sight of several makeshift stars glowing brightly above them both, leaving New York's night sky dull in comparison. The tiny dots of glowing paint made for a beautiful galaxy, and he swore he could even make out some constellations.  
     “... _Groovy_ ,” was all Lizzy was able to murmur.  
     “First time for everything,” Max said, somehow able to calm himself in his current state of mind.  
     “What do you mean?” Her far away voice made it apparent that she was still in awe.  
     “I don't think we ever stargazed together.”  
     Still she stayed silent. Max threw his head sloppily to the side and gave her a bloodshot stare. Still her eyes were stuck on the ceiling.  
     “...What?” she finally asked.  
     He searched his mind. “I...I don't remember,” he chuckled. Finally Lizzy looked over to him, and amused snickers rose in her throat. Her green eyes squinted up with her excited smile.  
     “You're so high!” she exclaimed loudly and then shrunk away as Max quickly shushed her. He gripped to her arm tightly and began to laugh with her once more.  
     “I'm high? You're the one that's tripping out over there!”  
     “Well I...” Again her eyes drifted upwards, “I just never noticed that before.”  
     “You've been sleeping in this room for how long now, and you never noticed a freaking _galaxy_ on your ceiling?”  
     “I don't really sleep in here that often,” she replied matter-of-factly, “Recently I've been out of the house a lot, and when I do manage to get home I just crash on the couch.” Still she was entranced. Rolling back over, Max sent his clearing gaze upwards once more. The light from the red and yellow lava lamps just barely danced into his vision from across the room. It made the stars look as though they were moving. “This is amazing,” Lizzy spoke softly, “I wonder who took the time to paint all those little dots?”  
     “It must have been worth the effort.”  
     “Yeah!” Now she sounded excited, “I bet the first time they laid down and looked up at it when it was done, they were probably like...”  
     “Groovy,” Max piped in, saying the word in unison with her, trying to pitch his voice to match hers. Lizzy threw an arm over and lightly punched at his stomach. That was enough to make him give a small “oof!” and sit back up. He held his gut and pretended as though he were hurt.  
     “You're _literally_ the same person, aren't you, Max?”  
     “Yeah, just a little hairier,” he tugged at his mustache and twisted it at the end.  
     She giggled and rolled over to face him, propping her head up with her hand, “Am I just dreaming this right now? Are you really here, Max?”  
     “Unfortunately,” he tucked her sweet sentiment gently away in his mind, but didn't respond as hazily, “you weren't able to hide from me forever.”  
     Apparently Lizzy was finished laughing and joking. “I'm glad you made it back...from Vietnam, I mean. It makes me sad to think that they _drafted_ you...”  
     Max looked down at the ground. “Interview time, huh?”  
     “I really could care less about that article,” was her genuine reply, “everyone knows what's going on in the world is fucked up. I mean...Jesus Christ, Petey...” Glancing back in Lizzy's direction, Max was surprised to see her brow furrowed into a sad expression. “I didn't mean to make him upset like that. If I knew that, I wouldn't have even gone there, you know? Marcus told me he was kind of _shy_ , but...”  
     “Hey, it's okay,” Max reached out to pat her head, “Petey doesn't seem it, but he's a tough guy. I'm sure if I'd met him before the war he would have been a lot of fun to wrestle with.”  
     Lizzy snickered, “Is goofing around all you ever think of?”  
     “That and tits.”  
     “Yeah, tits are pretty awesome,” her snicker turned into a bright laugh.  
     “Whoa, I didn't know you swung that way!” His actual curiosity was thinly layered in the joke.  
     “I try not to focus too much on gender,” she told him truthfully.  
     “So will you make out with Faith for me?” Lizzy laughed at her friend. “Come on! Once in a lifetime request!”  
     “Okay,” she joked, “but only if you make out with Marcus for me.”  
     “...Yeah; it'd be worth it.” Daring a familiar touch, Max began to tickle and Lizzy's sides.  
     She jerked away, laughing, “Max, no! Please!” Of course he didn't stop. She grabbed at his wrists and rolled her head back, cackling loudly. Max rose to his knees and leaned over her. “I can't breathe!” she kept laughing, starting to push him forcefully away. Still Max went on, apparently never quite sure when to just stop. Lizzy sat up and softly pushed his head away with hers, the top of her head brushing against his cheek. Distracted by the sudden sweet smell of her hair, Max stopped himself.  
     The woman leaned back, sitting cross-legged now, and smiled as she caught her breath. In silence, Max wondered quiet suddenly if anyone else was still awake. He hoped so; at least then he and Lizzy could continue to laugh and scream as loud as they wanted.  
     “So...” she breathed, “...are you?”  
     She didn't need to specify. Max knew just what she was talking about. It was unfortunate that their chance meeting happened to be so that she could talk to him about his state of mind. So Lizzy was curious, and rightly so, he thought. “...Yeah.” For some reason being up front with her about it made him feel strangely comfortable.  
     “Oh...” She hadn't sounded disappointed. If anything, Max felt as though she were simply accepting it. “Well at least now you can do whatever you want and just play the 'crazy' card to get out of it!” Even after so long, she still sounded like the same Lizzy he always knew, trying to comfort him and distract him from his troubles.  
     “Yeah; let's go rob a bank,” Max gave her a fiendish grin.  
     She nodded in response, but she grew serious once more. “You know I don't really care about that, right?”  
     His heart thudded at the sudden heavy atmosphere, “What do you mean?”  
     “I mean... No matter what happened...or happ _ens_...I'll still be there for you. I don't want you to think I'm gonna treat you any differently than before...” Max was sincerely touched. He could feel his throat growing tighter. “So, that means _no more_...sentimental crap like this.” She stood up with a smile and extended her hand out to him. He stared up at her, the glowing stars and colorful lights made her look surreal. “Your roommates are probably worried about you. Think you're okay to walk home now?” Reality slammed into him, and he had to stop himself from frowning. Extending a hand upwards, he felt a bit of deja vu from earlier that evening. How could he not have recognized her?  
     “I think I should be able to make it.”  
     “Groovy.” Max had quickly grown to like her new little catchphrase. “Something tells me Carol and Faith are still awake, so I'll walk you out.”  
     “'Preciate it.”  
     They walked through the hall a few feet apart from each other. Although it had grown quiet in the apartment, two soft voices could still barely be heard. As Max passed by the door, Carol shouted over at him.  
     “You're lucky I was stoned when you got here!” As Lizzy passed by the door she shot the woman a glare. “Oh, shove it _Lizzy,_ ” Carol prattled on. Faith slapped at her arm. “...Sorry. That idiot just puts me in a foul mood.”  
     Lizzy relinquished a smile, “Me too.” Max gave a soft smirk from the other side of the doorway where he stayed pressed against the wall and out of sight. Lizzy winked over at him, then looked back to her roommates. “Where's Petey?”  
     “He went home. I guess he got tired of waiting.” Max frowned at the daggers in Faith's reply. Lizzy only nodded and made a small jump over to her friend, pushing him a few feet further down the hall with a comforting laugh.  
     “Don't worry about it, Max. I'm sure he was just tired.”  
     “Yeah, yeah. I know Petey's not gonna be mad. He's a good guy.” Slowing his pace, Max stood at the front door now. “Sorry your interview got effectively canceled.”  
     “That's okay. Doing that article was starting to make me depressed anyway.”  
     “I bet...” Max shuffled his feet a bit nervously, looking down as he scuffed his shoes lightly into the carpet.  
     “...I still can't believe it,” Lizzy said through a soft chuckle.  
     “Yeah, me either. I can't believe you cut all your hair off, too.”  
     “Tch. You grew it out _for_ me... I'll see you later,” she smiled and opened the door.  
     “Yeah... See you later,” Max's vivid memory of her standing at her bedroom window washed over him. He smiled and nodded, and was soon pacing down the steps into the lobby.

 

✼✌✼

 

     “Really, Lizzy?” Carol was the first to chime in from the girl's bedroom door. She had been looking out her window, watching Max as he walked down the street towards his apartment. She jumped when her friend had entered unannounced.  
     “What?” she asked, somewhat flustered. “I just...can't believe it is all.”  
     Faith appeared next to Carol in moments, and of course pitched in her two cents: “Max is _trouble_ , Lizzy.”  
     “No, he's my friend!” She realized she hadn't shared the news with her roommates.  
     “Oh, I know,” Faith spoke, “Marcus told us all about it once Petey started to wonder where Max was. Look, I don't know how you remember him being, but you can just forget it. Like I said, that boy is trouble.”  
     “That boy...” Carol walked into the room, tailed closely by Faith, and they flanked her on either side. All three sets of eyes watched after him. “ _That boy took my love away,_ ” The blonde began to sing. Faith chimed in quickly, and they sang together, “ _Though he'll regret it someday._ ”  
     Down on the sidewalk, Max couldn't hold back his grin. “ _But this boy wants you back again!_ ”  
     Lizzy crossed her arms over her chest as their song continued around her, “ _That boy isn't good for you..._ ” Lizzy sighed. Carol and Faith put a hand on each of her shoulders and nodded to the music that filled the bedroom, “ _Though he may want you too..._ ”  
     As Max looked up to the still starry night sky, he remembered lying on the floor with Lizzy, staring up at their own secret universe. “ _This boy wants you back again..._ ” Suddenly a doubt nagged at his belly. “ _Oh, and this boy would be happy...just to love you! But oh my!_ ” He cast his eyes down to the ground at the feeling. Would she feel the same way?  
     “ _That boy won't be happy,_ ” gently Carol and Faith tugged Lizzy towards her bed and sat there with her. “ _'Till he's seen you cry._ ” The defeated, saddened look on Lizzy's face gained two sympathetic hugs.  
     Max had decided. “ _This boy wouldn't mind the pain...would always feel the same!_ ” His new-found determination pushed a jolt of energy though him. “ _If this boy gets you back again!_ ” As he passed the phone booth, he turned and stared hopefully at her window. It was empty. His gaze became distant. His heart faltered. “ _This boy..._ ” he sang softly into the air. “ _This boy..._ ” he could feel his lower lip quiver. “ _This boy..._ ” The sudden doubt that consumed him was dizzying.

 


	9. Long Tall Sally

     “Alright, Max, I’ll catch you later.” Lizzy patted him roughly on the back, “Have fun in there, okay? Still, want me to meet back up with you at twelve?”  
     “May as well,” Max teased. The two exchanged a loose hug and Lizzy turned to leave, unaware of the blue eyes that briefly followed her down the sidewalk.  
     It had been only a week since the friends were reunited, and on Sunday night Max had called to ask Lizzy a favor. As Max stood, staring up at the dreadful building in front of him, he recalled their conversation on the phone.  
     They had just calmed themselves from laughing when Max piped up, “Hey, can you do something for me?”  
     “Depends on what it is,” she joked, the smile still apparent in her voice.  
     “Tomorrow I’ve got a, uh…” although he didn’t exactly want to tell her, he knew it was for the best, “I’ve got a group therapy…thing to go to. Is there any way you could meet me at the hospital when I get out at twelve? Someone else used to pick me up, but” he had hesitated at the notion, but pushed through, “but she can’t do it anymore.”  
     “Sure!” Lizzy didn’t skip a beat, “I can go with you too if you want! What time does it start?”  
     Max was caught off guard, but answered with a smile, “That sounds good. I have to be there at ten thirty.”  
     “Groovy. I’ll be at your place. I gotta ask, though: Are you just too lazy to drive there?” Her gentle joke put him at ease.  
     “Well the first time I went,” he told her, “on the way home I went on a wild rampage and ran over a good fifty or sixty people.” Her delighted giggling sent him into a small tizzy. “So I prefer to just walk there and get a ride back. Having someone there with me after that bullshit is always better.”  
     “Considering I still don’t have a car, I hope you don’t mind if I just give you a piggyback ride.”  
     “We’ll have to get you a really nice saddle first.”  
     “Ooh, naughty,” she cooed. But her tone had picked up quickly, “Good deal. I’ll be there bright and early tomorrow morning to try to wake your lazy ass up.”  
     “Cool. I’ll be out there.”  
     As the memory passed, so did Max through the double doors, back into the heavy reality of his obligations. At least Peter would be there.  
     “Max!” Of course, he was the first to notice his friend. He seemed to be very relaxed in comparison to his usual, nervous self. Max found the change to be quite settling.  
     “Hey, buddy!” He took his usual seat next to the dark-haired man and was surprised when he was met with a strong hug. He returned it, though, of course, but as he pulled away from the warm embrace he once again remembered where he was.  
     “Nice to see you again, Mr. Carrigan.” The monotone voice buzzed in his ears.  
     “Nice to be back,” was his cheeky reply.  
     “Wonderful. I hope there will be no more outbursts from you this time.”  
     Max shrugged, “You told me to express myself!”  
     “Indeed.” The psychiatrist’s attention was pulled to the other members, and he droned on with his usual speech about “self-importance” and “ _feelings_.” But when Peter’s name was mentioned, Max had decided not to tune him out. “I want to recognize Peter,” he gestured over to the man with a wide, sweeping motion. “I feel as though he has made a lot of progress since our last two meetings, and I also feel as though he sets a good example for all of us.” Peter blushed at the soft claps that met him. “That being said, Peter, do you have anything to share with us?”  
     “Um… Yes,” came his shaky reply. Max smiled as his friend sat up, holding his head up high, dismissing his nerves, “Last week I did… _part of_ an interview about my, uh…experiences.” The psychiatrist slowly leaned forward, listening closely to the man as he spoke. “I didn’t get to make it through the whole thing, because…” He drifted, and Max’s heart fluttered as he saw the distant stare returning to Peter’s eyes. But he was surprised when Peter shook his head and trudged on, “I talked about something I’ve never told anyone except Max… And I did a lot of crying,” for a moment he seemed ashamed, “but… I think it really helped me get back to my old self!” He beamed a smile at the group, “I won’t go into detail – I mean I don’t want to upset anyone, but just… It’s really important to talk to your friends. Because if they’re even really worth calling a friend they'll understand...and they'll help you through it.” Peter looked over at Max and nodded. But as more claps sounded around him, he looked down once more.  
     “That’s quite a breakthrough,” Max could swear he heard some actual emotion in their adviser’s voice. He was proud of Peter. “Did anyone learn something from that?” There were a few nods in the group, and some of the men had given each other glances that almost mirrored the admiration that Peter had expressed. “Good. Now, let’s go ahead and continue on with…”  
     Max tuned him out immediately and leaned over to his friend. “That was awesome, Petey. You’re really doing a lot better, huh?”  
     He smiled and nodded, “Yep. I even got Faith’s number before I left that party last week!”  
     “What!” Max laughed, tickled by the notion that Peter had addressed that little get-together as a “party,” “That crazy chick? Why not Carol?”  
     “From what I heard, Carol can’t cook like Faith!”  
     Max couldn’t help but smile, “Thinkin’ about hooking up with her?”  
     His friend became shy once more, looking down at his feet, “I don’t know… Even though I didn't want to...she made me take her money when she lost the bet. So I figured I’d use it to buy her dinner.”  
     “You didn’t spend it all on booze already?” Max allowed himself a mischievous smile and lightly nudged Peter’s arm with his elbow.  
     “Nah. I haven’t been spending much time at the bar lately, believe it or not.”  
     “Still coming tonight?”  
     “Of course!”  
     “Gentlemen,” came the drilling, monotone voice once more. Both of them whipped their heads to face the front of the semi-circle. “I’d love to allow you to keep chatting with one another, but let’s _try_ to make some more progress today, Mr. Carrigan. I’m sure Peter will agree with me.” Max jumped at the rough slap of support Peter gave him. Looking over, he saw a bright smile and a nod.  
     Pushing air from pursed lips, Max leaned forward, “Okay.”  
     “Excellent.” The doctor pulled out his notebook and pen, “Please begin.”  
     “Just…anything?”  
     “Anything you feel like you need to get off your chest, Mr. Carrigan. I hate to repeat myself but please…no more outbursts.”  
     “Well…” Immediately the doctor began to scribble. “I think…” He couldn’t do it. These people didn’t deserve it. “I think it’s bullshit that you cram us all in here together and force us to talk about things we don’t want to talk about.”  
     “Didn’t you hear Peter’s speech earlier?” was the older man’s cool reply. Still, he scribbled. Max gave a sideways glance to Peter who continued to nod.  
     “Only if you feel like it,” the man supported his friend through a whisper. Suddenly Max remembered how quickly Peter had agreed to do an interview – just to help his friend. Leaning back in his chair, Max decided he would return the favor. Peter would want him to talk about _something_.  
     So, watching their adviser, he said the first thing that came to his mind: “I found out that I hate when people write down every word I say.” The doctor’s eyes peered up from his notepad and stared for a moment at Max. Surprisingly, the man leaned up and gently tossed his notebook down on the floor beside him. “…I don’t know, man, I just don’t like thinking about it.”  
     “Thank you, Mr. Carrigan. Unless you have anything else to say, I think that’s enough for now.” Max was surprised, to say the least.  
     “No, uh…I guess that’s it.” Tucking himself back away, Max was still surprised by the course of events. Although he wasn’t met with the same round of applause as Peter, he still felt a bit better about therapy. Maybe it wasn’t so bad after all. Again he was jerked from his thoughts by a hard slap on his back. Peter was absolutely gleaming with excitement.  
     The clock struck twelve, and the group members all headed towards the door, chatting amongst themselves on the way. Max and Peter stood together after everyone had left.  
     “Sorry I kind of…accidentally threw you under the bus like that,” Peter said with a meager smile, “I didn’t mean to do that.”  
     “I know it, Petey.” Max threw his arm around the man’s neck and pulled him close, roughing up his hair.  
     “Hey!” Peter swatted with a laugh, “Don’t make me do it, Max!”  
     “Do what? You ain’t got nothin’!” Max joked.  
     “I’ll show you ‘nothin’!’” In a swift movement, Peter reached his arm up and grabbed Max’s hat from the top of his head. “Go get it!” he tossed it like a frisbee across the room, and out the front door it went.  
     “Oh, sorry!” Peter apologized genuinely as Max let him go.  
     “That’s okay, man, I got it.”  
     “Okay! Hey, uh, I’m gonna talk to Doc about something,” he pointed with his thumb at the psychiatrist who was still looking over his notes, “Is Jude coming with you this time?”  
     “If he’s not busy being _artsy_ ,” Max teased his friend from afar.  
     “Cool. I’ll see you guys there.”

     As Max left the building, he searched for his hat. He was a bit confused that it wasn’t right by the door where it had landed. Did someone take it? For a moment, frustration pulled at his stomach. He ran a hand through his hair.  
     “Hey, Max…” A tiny voice caught his attention. When he looked over, his heart dropped.  
     Sally stood leaning her back against the building, staring down at the brown hat in her hands. Max looked around in confusion. Where was Lizzy?  
     “What are you doing here?” Max tried to hold back his need to hug the woman. She looked so sad.  
     “I wish you would have told me… You know, about what’s wrong with you.”  
     “Nothing’s _wrong_ with me,” Max became defensive.  
     “Sorry… It’s just…now that I know that, I feel like we can make this work!”  
     “Sally, you were with another guy,” he tried to forget the painful memory.  
     “I made a mistake, Max! I was confused and… I really miss you. I just want things to go back to the way they were. You never looked at me the same, and it hurt.” Her bright blue eyes began to shine with tears. Max took a step forward but stopped himself short, glaring angrily down at the concrete as he shoved his hands into his pockets. “And every time I touched you, you would pull away. I just thought you didn’t love me anymore…” Max stayed quiet. He heard a few small footsteps and soon felt one of Sally’s soft hands lifting his head up to look into his eyes. As they gazed at each other, Max’s good memories with Sally came rushing back. The way she had always laughed at his jokes, and the way she held him after they made love…she had really made him happy at one point in their lives.  
     She kissed him, and he didn’t stop her. Her lips were soft and warm, and when she leaned back, her small giggle made his heart flutter. As she placed Max’s hat back on his head, he smiled.  
     “Thanks…”  
     “I’m sorry I treated you the way I did. I’ll be more careful from now on. I know that whole…kind of thing can be pretty delicate. But I’ll be more mindful of that, Max… Just, please, let me be with you again. I can take care of you. I can _help_ you.” Max looked off to the side once more. He was lost in his thoughts in an instant. “Max…?” she spoke softly.  
     “Max! Sorry I’m late!” Sally and Max both turned towards the voice that piped up behind them between short breaths. “Carol was trying to tell me about… Oh! Sorry, am I interrupting something?” Lizzy feigned a polite smile. Her green eyes went straight to Sally.  
     “Um… No. I was just leaving.” Sally was curt with her response, and she headed back towards her car in a flurry. Max watched her, but only adjusted the hat on his head and turned towards his friend.  
     Her smile became genuine, “Sorry about that. She your girlfriend?”  
     “She used to be,” Max spoke, striding over to the brunette and putting his arm loosely around her shoulders, “but that’s over.”  
     “Is it? I dunno, you two sure were making googly eyes!” Her elbow jabbed into his ribs. Max jerked away from the slight pain and couldn’t suppress the smile that came to his lips. As they broke off onto the sidewalk, mingling with many brightly dressed individuals, Lizzy kept her casual tone: “I’m surprised you had a girlfriend! Carol and Faith told me about your little ‘commitment’ issues. Seems like you could never have a girlfriend for very long, huh?”  
     “What can I say? I like ladies!” Still holding her, he gave her a little shake.  
     She laughed and pushed him away, walking a few steps ahead. “And they like you!”  
     Her exclamation struck him for a moment, but he pushed on, “I think it’s the ‘stache.” Again he twirled it at its tip.  
     Her eyes sparkled, but her laugh was a soft one. “That’s okay, though. Mingling is cool as long as everyone involved knows about it.”  
     “Tell me about it.” The vision of Sally holding hands with another man pestered the back of his mind.  
     “What was her name?”  
     “…Sally.”  
     “Sally!” Lizzy tested the name on her own tongue, “That’s a cute name! Why’d you two break it off?”  
     “It’s… It’s kind of a long story.”  
     “That’s cool, that’s cool. Anytime you wanna tell me I’m here.” She slowed her pace to stand next to Max and bump into him, sending him stumbling to the side a few inches. Max didn’t laugh. Lizzy stopped short. “What’s up?”  
     “Nah, it’s just…” He wasn’t sure if he would be able to find the right words.  
     “Do you still like her?” Lizzy pondered aloud.  
     “I dunno. Now I’m starting to wonder… I thought things were looking up, but now she just shoves herself back into my life, and I… I dunno,” he shrugged, staring down at the sidewalk as people passed them.  
     “Hey…” Lizzy’s touch on his shoulder was soft, “It’s alright. Clarity will come to you soon enough. You’ve just got to be patient… But I know that’s hard for you!” For the second time that day, Max’s hat was lifted from his head. Lizzy donned it and smiled her bright smile up at him, “What do you think?”  
     “I think it looks better on me,” Max managed a genuine smile.  
     “Well, I disagree! And as punishment for your _incorrect_ opinion, you’re not getting this back _unless_ …you beat me back to your place!” Before Max could even agree Lizzy had darted off with a fiendish giggle. She blended easily in with the other New Yorkers that slumped and danced around. Watching her playfully looking over her shoulder every now and again made him recall her words from just moments ago. Was this the kind of clarity he was seeking? “Come on, _loverboy_!” came Lizzy’s daring call from down the street. His heart pounded. With an ecstatic laugh, Max chased after Lizzy.

 

✼✌✼

 

     Jude’s voice sounded from the front room, “Max, the phone’s for you!” Curiosity pricked at him and lifted him to his feet. He leaned out of his bedroom doorway.  
     “Who is it?”  
     “I dunno. Sounds like a girl.” With a smirk, he held out the receiver to him, “She didn’t sound too pleased.”  
     “Shit! Sally…” Jude only continued to smirk as Max took the phone and stepped away. “Hello?”  
     “Max, I need to talk to you. Is there any way we can meet up somewhere?”  
     “…It’s kinda late,” Max remarked.  
     “It’s only one thirty.” Sally didn’t sound amused. Max looked back towards his bedroom where Lizzy was still talking in hushed, excited tones with Lucy.  
     “I’m in the middle of something.”  
     “Oh… Well, do you at least have a few minutes?”  
     “Sure.” Max let out a sigh and leaned against the small glass table that held the phone.  
     “Who was that girl from earlier?” The jealousy in her voice was unbearable.  
     “An old friend,” Max said coolly. He allowed himself to reminisce for a moment before Sally’s voice cut in:  
     “I’m not stupid, Max.” He wanted to disagree with her on the spot, but he was at least more of a gentleman than that.  
     “No, you’re not.”  
     Sally sighed before she spoke, “Look, I know that your head is kind of messed up right now, but you could at least tell me before you go running off with someone!”  
     Max was genuinely confused. “Oh, like you told me?” There was silence on the phone. “…Sorry.”  
     “Is it over between us?” her voice was filled with sorrow. There was no point in stringing her along like she had done to him, he decided.  
     “Yeah. It’s over, Sally.” She didn’t reply. The phone clicked and a dial tone rang loudly in Max’s ear. “God damn it…” he set the phone down. Looking over, he noticed that Jude still stood in the room, smoking a cigarette over by the window. One of his many paintings of Lucy stood next to him on the wall. It seemed like those two were always together.  
     “Sally?” Jude asked, “I didn’t know you kept girlfriends, Max.”  
     “I’m a collector of many things,” Max smiled and crossed his arms over his chest. How couldn’t he? Jude gave a soft laugh and a leading glance over to Max’s bedroom where Lizzy and Lucy were still talking, presumably catching up.  
     “And, uh…is she a part of your new collection?” His voice stayed cool and even.  
     Max smiled, “Why? What do you think of her?”  
     He shrugged and pushed the end of his cigarette into an ashtray on the windowsill, “I dunno. But it’s not really about what I think of her, is it?” Max smiled down at the ground upon Jude’s observation. He was happy to have him there; his brain was probably a lot less muddied than his.  
     “I think I’m still trying to figure it out,” Max held his smirk, “after all these years, I’m still just as confused as ever.”  
     “That’s usually part of it.”  
     “Part of what?”  
     Jude smiled the way that only he could; “I don’t think it’s my place to tell you.”  
     Two sets of soft footsteps came through the hall, and soon Lizzy and Lucy stood before the two of them, arms linked.  
     “I came up with a great idea,” Lucy’s eyes sparkled.  
     “What’s that?” Jude was the first to reply.  
     “I was thinking that maybe we should all go on a little road trip to see Mom and Dad. I’m sure it’d be a surprise to see Lizzy coming in the house with us.”  
     “Yeah, they’d probably just shout ‘You again!’ and slam the door in my face.” Lizzy chuckled in her addition.  
     Lucy’s lips pulled into a smile, “You’re so weird!”  
     “Yeah, well, your brother had a pretty big influence on me.”  
     “Why am I the bad guy now?” butted in Max with a mocking frown. He took a moment to reach out and messed up Lucy’s straight hair, “Someone miss Mommy and Daddy?”  
     “I’m just sure they’re worried to _death_ about you,” Lucy laughed and pushed Max’s hand away before tidying the mess he’d made.  
     It was Jude who piped up this time, “They should be!”  
     “Oh, so it’s time to gang up on Max now, huh?” The man quickly stepped over to Jude and pulled him into a mock headlock. The room filled with laughter.  
     “Guys!” came a curt voice from behind them. Turning, they spotted Jojo peeping out of he and Sadie’s room. He held an index finger to his lips. All of their eyes went from him to the clock on the wall which plainly read a time of 1:32 PM. Sadie was still sleeping.  
     “Sorry,” Max whispered, letting go of Jude and straightening up. Jojo didn’t reply, but he did give a nod as he shut the door. After a few moments, the group looked at each other and snickered.  
     “So are we gonna make this happen?” Lucy spoke softly now.  
     “I don’t see why not,” Max grinned and threw his arm around Jude’s shoulders once more, “It’s about time they met their new son!”  
     “C’mere, you,” Jude said through gritted teeth and a smile. He lifted Max into the air and carried him to the bedroom. The girls followed suit, trying to keep their giggles quiet as they slipped past Sadie’s room. Max was tossed onto his bed.  
     “Some brother you are!” he laughed, sitting himself back up.  
     “I’ll go call up Mom. I’m sure she’ll be happy to see us again.”  
     “Don’t tell her about Lizzy though!” was Max’s quick interjection as Lucy turned away. “Let’s surprise them!” Max loved innocent little secrets. He remembered the secret he had kept from his sister not too long ago. Upon reflection, he noted that it had certainly been worth it. Lucy gave him a quick nod and a smile before leaving. Jude was quick to follow after her.  
     “Making decisions without me, huh?” Max teased the girl that had stayed behind.  
     “I’m a grown up!”  
     “ _Barely_. But that's okay; that's the way I like 'em.”  
     “At least I’m not a big, blue-eyed, blubbering _baby_!”  
     “Hey! …I don’t _blubber_. I _weep_ , thank you very much.”  
     “I’ll tell you what you’re _about_ to do!”  
     “What?”  
     “Get some sweet, sweet payback!” Before Max could react, Lizzy had jumped on him, straddling him on the bed, and she viciously began to tickle at his sides. Max jerked this way and that, trying to suppress the laughter that wanted so badly to explode out of him. “Lizzy, Sadie’s still asleep!”  
     “That just means you’ll have to hold it in! Payback’s a bitch!”  
     “Lizzy!” he panted, “Lizzy, stop!” Finally, his laughter bellowed out of him. A door slammed and footsteps thudded down the hall. Lizzy was quick to push herself away from her friend, and she rolled over to sit next to him on the bed as he sat himself up.  
     Sadie’s hair was all over the place, and she didn’t look too pleased. “Just give me thirty more minutes, guys,” she growled, attempting in vain to sound understanding, “just thirty more minutes.”  
     Terrified, Max and Lizzy nodded in unison. As Sadie left, headed back to her bedroom, the two looked over at each other, still wide-eyed.  
     Lizzy’s expression was the first to change, and she snickered with delight, “You look like a puppy, Max,” she whispered. Noticing the face he must have been making, he couldn’t help but break it only to smile back at her.  
     “Excited to go back home?” He changed the subject smoothly once he heard Lucy’s voice from down the hall, still on the phone with their mother.  
     Lizzy sat back a bit and huffed a sigh out through her smiling lips, “I am! It’s gonna be crazy. I can just feel it.”  
     “Yeah… You know, I’m kind of getting that feeling too. …Oh, wait.” Max let out a rather loud belch, “Nope, just gas.”  
     Lizzy laughed. “ _Thirty more minutes_ ,” she playfully mocked Sadie. Max gave her a soft chuckle and with a short “C'mere!” pulled her into a friendly embrace.

 


	10. You've Got to Hide Your Love Away

     “Another successful “crazy” meeting, huh, Petey?”  
     “Definitely better than last week. What was it you said again? You hate it when people write what you're saying?” Peter teased his friend through his new-found confidence. Max liked what therapy was doing to Peter; he liked him before, but mellowed-out Peter was fine in his book too.  
     “Yeah, yeah,” Max playfully shoved him, making his bar stool spin just a bit underneath.  
     Marcus piped up from where he sat next to Max, “Jude couldn't make it today?”  
     “Nah, he's off with Lucy doing...something, I dunno. Probably planning for our road trip tomorrow.”  
     “Road trip, huh?” Peter smiled, “That sounds like it could be fun! Is it just gonna be you three?”  
     “Well, us and Lizzy,” Max smiled down to his beer at the mention of her name.  
     “Oh yeah! I forgot she used live across the street from you. Wow, so that's probably gonna be a fun trip for her too, huh?”  
     “Yeah, it'll be a lot of _fun_.” Max groaned, “I swear, there's nothing to do there, though. And apparently we'll be staying the night. I sure as hell can't spend the whole day at my parents' house, but there's nothing _else_ to do.”  
     “Maybe you need a change of scenery to clear things up for ya,” Peter patted Max's shoulder. “Who knows? You might actually wind up having fun!”  
     “If my sister lets me borrow her bike, I guess.”  
     “You may as well borrow one of her skirts while you're at it,” Peter chuckled. The three men had a good laugh before, silently, Max held his index finger to the bartender.  
     Marcus changed the topic of discussion quickly. He didn't want to imagine Max in a skirt any longer. Leaning over a bit, he addressed Peter. “Did you and Faith have that double date yet?”  
     “Ooh, a double date!” Max grinned, “Who'd you two go with?”  
     “Well it was me, Faith, Lizzy, and...what was his name again?” Max's ears buzzed loudly over Peter and Marcus talking to one another. His beer was slid over to him, but he was far too dazed to catch it. It clanked loudly against Peter's glass and caused he and Max to both jump.  
     “Oh! Sorry,” Max was quick to take his drink. Lifting it to his lips, he threw his head back and swallowed the whole beverage in four quick gulps. Setting the glass down with watery eyes, catching his breath, he held up his index finger once more. Waiting for his drink he had to ask, “Did Lizzy have a good time? I mean...did you guys have a good time?”  
     “Yeah! It was a lot of fun; at one point--”  
     “Was he some really strong muscle guy?”  
     “Who? Jack?”  
     “Tch. _Jack_. What a stupid name.”  
     Peter gave him an awkward laugh, “About as stupid as _Max_ , I guess.” Unfortunately, his friend was too far gone to hear the joke. Marcus was quick to reel him back in.  
     “Look, man, Carol and Faith spent a week trying to hook this cat up with Elizabeth. And from what I've seen, they're a good fit. Don't go and mess it up for them.” Again a mug of beer was sent sliding down the surface of the bar. Max was sure to catch it this time, and sure to drink it down just as fast as the other one. “And no offense, but I don't think you would exactly be good for her.” It was hard for Marcus to forget the nights he stayed up with Carol and Faith while they shed their lonely, confused tears.  
     “But I...” Max cut himself short. “...I can't explain how I feel about her,” he sighed. The alcohol was making his senses fuzzy. “I just...” He stood and began to pace behind them. A guitar plucked a lonesome tune from just outside the bar.  
     “ _Here I stand, head in hand, turn my face to the wall,_ ” he gave a slow spin, and fell back into his bar stool. “ _If she's gone I can't go on, feeling two-foot small..._ ” Max gave a cautious, shy look around the bar, noticing the few glances he had caught. “ _Everywhere people stare...each and every day..._ ” A couple in the corner giggled at each other, hugging and speaking softly to one another. Max frowned. “ _I can see them laugh at me, and I hear them say..._ ” His last note was held out as he cast his eyes back down to his empty mug.  
     Marcus cut in, “ _Hey! You've got to hide your love away!_ ” Max stood from his seat once more and stumbled out of the bar. Of course, Marcus called after him, “ _Hey! You're got to hide your love away!_ ”

     Sitting next to Prudence at his window was little comfort. As the melancholic melody drew on, he continued to croon. “ _How can I even try? I can never win..._ ” The sudden sound of laughter caught his attention, and he looked down into the alleyway below them. He saw, of all things, Lizzy arm in arm with a man. “ _Hearing them, seeing them...in the state I'm in..._ ” Prudence gently rubbed his back. “ _How could she say to me--_ ”  
     “ _Love will find a way,_ ” Prudence butted in and gave Max a tight hug before leaving him to himself. Still Max stared down at the ground, watching as Lizzy and who was _presumably_ Jack faded into the distance. “ _Gather 'round all you clowns,_ ” was his sorrowful cry, “ _Let me hear you say..._ ” Marcus's words stung in his mind, and he sang them aloud and though he were trying to drive the point into his own mind. “ _Hey! You've got to hide your love away! ...Hey, you've got to hide your love away..._ ”  
     He drew himself away from the window, sitting with his back against its frame as the song faded. A car passed below on the street, and the sudden bright flash sent Max reeling. His eyelids fluttered, and his vision blurred. Before too long he was left to stare at his bedroom door. Time seemed to slow down, and the wooden door grew a bit further from his vision. Lucy passed in slow motion, just looking into its window, and her eyes grew wide. The door swung open and she passed through. Her footsteps seemed to just barely keep her running across the room. Her small hands grabbed tightly onto his arm, and still slowly she began to tug at him. Her screams were just barely muffled over the gunshots and bombs exploding in his mind.  
     Each blink down to the alleyway below became quicker and quicker.  
     “Jesus, Max!” he could finally hear Lucy clearly. His heart pounded as he realized he had been leaning drastically out the window. Now with his assistance, Lucy was able to pull her brother away, and he landed with a clumsy thud onto the floor. “What are you doing!” She sounded almost angry, but soon she had slumped down next to him and drew him into a tight hug. Sobs consumed her almost immediately. Max wished he could say something to calm her, but his eyes had become drawn into a far away world once more. Just barely he could see several sets of bare feet standing at the doorway and then rushing in.  
     Muffled voices surrounded him, and although he couldn't understand their words, it somehow brought a calm over him. Soft hands patted at his face, but he could only focus now on the ceiling light above them. Soon a dark shadow passed over the light, and he flinched away from the sudden change. His body was passed back to the first hands that had held him, and the voices grew quiet.  
     Catching his breath, Max finally heard the clear noise of silent sobbing near him. Looking down he saw the top of Lucy's head, and he could feel her arms wrapped tightly around him and the warmth of her tears on his shirt. His eyes gazed across the room to see Jude sitting on the floor. His back was leaned against the closed bedroom door, and he stared off to the side biting at his nails. Max was able to lift his arm and bring his hand to the top of Lucy's head. Jude looked up and watched with slight concern and hope both. Lucy leaned away from her brother for a moment, and Max was struck at the sad look on her face.  
     “What happened, Max?” she asked gently.  
     “I...I dunno...” Again he looked over at Jude. “Shit... Sorry, man.” Since Jude had come back, Max hadn't had any “episodes.” He knew it must have been frightening to see him that way.  
     His friend offered him an encouraging smile, “Don't worry about it.” He stood and paced over to Max, sitting cross-legged once more in front of him. “D'you need a drink?”  
     Lucy was quick to rebuke the idea, “He doesn't need _beer_ , Jude. He _just_ got back from there.” Max was surprised at the sting in his sister's tone, but Jude stayed calm.  
     “Well he doesn't need to stay in this room.”  
     “...Fine.” Lucy gave her brother one last squeeze before standing. “But if anything happens...be sure to call, okay?” Jude nodded, giving her a calm smile as she left the room. It was obvious that her fear for Max and her trusting in Jude were not meshing very well in that moment. Max appreciated her understanding.  
     “Sorry you had to see that,” Max apologized once more, crossing his arms over his chest and slumping his shoulders.  
     “That's okay,” Jude smirked, “I had a fun time herding everyone out of the room. Yelling at Sadie was quite a change.”  
     “Damn... They saw, too?”  
     “Yeah, but I don't think they'll give you a hard time; you know how they are. They just care about you is all.” Max nodded slowly, still looking down at the floorboards. “You think Petey's still at the bar?” Jude attempted to entice his friend and lift his spirits.  
     Max gave a crooked smile, “...Probably.”  
     “Then what are we waiting for? Let's go! Come on!” Jude yanked Max up to his feet with ease and both of the boys laughed.  
     Having changed shirts, Max walked out of his bedroom with Jude. They passed silently down the hall, but when they entered the main room, there was a sudden voice.  
     “Max!” Prudence called. She jumped up from where she had been sitting next to Sadie and ran over, throwing her arms around him. “Are you okay now?” She asked, looking up at him. Max returned the hug and gazed around the room to see Sadie and Jojo, as well as a few other tenants he couldn't quite recall, all sitting and looking up at him with concern.  
     His eyes glossed over, “Yeah, I'm fine.” As Prudence pulled away, he cleared his throat, “Me and Jude are gonna go out to the bar for a couple of hours.”  
     Sadie stood and, with a soft smile, placed a kiss on Max's forehead, “Just be careful.”  
     Jojo stood to follow her, “You're going out dressed like that?” he snorted out a playful laugh. As they both passed and headed back into the hallway, Max felt a huge weight lifting from his chest. After such a long time of people questioning him and his actions that he couldn't control, it was a welcome change to just be _accepted_ for once. But still Prudence looked up at him, giving him a sad stare. Max remembered when she had been sitting with him at the window, staring down at Lizzy.  
     “I'll be okay, Pru,” he gave her a gentle smile. If anyone knew how he was feeling, it was Prudence. She finally managed a bright smile and hugged him around the waist once more.  
     “I know it. Remember what I said.” After a tight squeeze she had skipped back over to the couch. “Have fun guys!” she called to them as they left.

 

✼✌✼

 

     Not many people were left in the bar by the time Jude and Max strolled in. Only one person was actually sat at the bar, in fact, and to both of their good fortune it was indeed Peter.  
     “Still here, you old _drunk_ , you?” Max called.  
     Peter looked quite surprised as he faced the two of them, “Max! Jude! I was just thinking about you! What are you doing back here?”  
     Max scooted into the bar stool next to him, and Jude sat on the other side of Max. “I had a bit of an _episode_.” Max sincerely did hate talking about his problems, but if anyone deserved the truth it was Peter.  
     “Whoa, man. You need to talk about it?” Peter's voice filled with concern in an instant.  
     “Nah, it's okay.”  
     “Don't give me that,” Peter smiled, “I thought we were past that.”  
     Max held his first two fingers to the bartender and leaned back a bit on his stool. “It's a weird thing to talk about,” he admitted genuinely. Even if he wanted to talk about it, he wouldn't know what to say. Two beers came sliding down the bar, and Max was quick to swallow a gulp of his. Jude leaned in a bit, still looking concerned for his friend. And so, Max changed the subject onto the only thing he could think about: “So did Lizzy and Jack have a good time?”  
     Peter's eyes sparkled, “You really care about her, don't you?”  
     Max took another quick chug of beer. “God damn it, yeah I do.”  
     “Then why don't you go for it, man?”  
     Max looked shocked, “But...Marcus said--”  
     “ _Fuck_ Marcus,” was Peter's cool reply, “I don't know what crawled into his ass lately, but he's changed. I don't care what he says; that Jack guy is a real idiot. And I don't mean an idiot like _you_ , Max, I mean an idiot like _it took him twenty minutes to decide what he wanted to eat, because he was trying to figure out which animal he 'felt the least sad for.'_ ”  
     Jude and Max both let out a judging, almost condescending laugh, but Max was the first to calm himself. “But...did Lizzy look like she was having a good time?”  
     Peter shrugged. “Most times I couldn't tell if she was laughing at him or with him.”  
     “But did she look happy?”  
     Jude piped in quickly almost sounding impatient, “Do you love her?” Both other men fell silent.  
     Suddenly Max remembered her slender frame behind her bedroom window. He remembered the pain in her face and how odd it looked accompanied by such a beautiful, bright yellow dress. “I'll see you later,” was what she had said to him. And even though Max couldn't hear her voice, he knew of the pain that was there. And he remembered his own pain. They held onto each other, and he cried. But she had dropped _everything_ she was feeling to make him feel better. The image of bright glow-in-the-dark stars danced into his memory, and he remembered how beautiful she looked silhouetted against them and the colorful light behind her. He remembered holding her hand as she helped him up. And suddenly he realized just how much she had helped him since they had known each other. It was never anything that she _tried_ to do...because she didn't have to. Just as she was, Lizzy was enough for Max.  
     “Yeah...” Max was surprised at the way his voice caught in his throat.  
     “Then go get her,” Jude spoke clearly and coolly.  
     “But...” He could barely handle the doubt that stabbed into him, “But what if she doesn't love _me_?”  
     “But what if she does?” Jude didn't need to be wordy to explain his thoughts on the matter.  
     Peter leaned in, “I'm with Jude on this one. If that's the girl for you, then you've got to go for it. What's there to lose?”  
     “...Her.”  
     “What?” Peter lifted an eyebrow.  
     “I can just picture it now...” Max spoke in dull tones, “I tell her how I feel, and then she gets flustered. And she only gets flustered when she's uncomfortable. And when she's uncomfortable, she...she tends to stay away from the source.”  
     Jude shook his head, “Do you really think that's how it would happen, Max?”  
     Peter nodded, “Just remember who you're talking about. She's one of your best friends, isn't she? Even if she doesn't feel the same, she'll still be there for you. You taught me that, Max.” Peter seemed to get choked up for a moment, “You can tell your best friends anything.”  
     Max looked over at Jude, and then back over at Peter. His lip quivered for a moment, and he nodded.  
     Peter roughly slapped his back, “Maybe if you get rid of that damn beard you'll _get_ a girl for once!”  
     Jude piped in with a thankful smile over at Peter, “Yeah, I have to admit, I haven't seen many girls around since you grew that thing out.”  
     “And the _last_ girl you had was a total _bitch_!”  
     After a few moments Max could feel his spirits lifting. And as a cheerful memory flashed into his mind, he laughed and shouted, “Get this guy's drinks on me!”

 


	11. In My Life

     “Lizzy,” came a soft voice. “Lizzy, wake up!” Her green eyes fluttered open, and she looked up at the stars that still barely glowed on her ceiling. Slowly she turned towards her door and saw Faith standing there, staring in at her.  
     The redhead gave her a soft smile, “Wake up, sleepyhead. You've got a road trip this morning!”  
     Lizzy smiled, finding it a bit easier to sit up and stretch her arms into the air. Faith strode into the room slowly and sat herself next to her friend on the bed.  
     “Are you excited to see your old house?”  
     “Maybe not the house,” Lizzy attempted to adjust her hair, “but definitely the neighborhood. And it'll be nice to see Mr. and Mrs. Carrigan again.” For a moment she laughed, “Max still hasn't told them; he said he wants to keep it a secret.” Looking up at the ceiling once more, she remembered the night they decided not to tell anyone else about their little universe. “Him and his secrets...”  
     “Sorry I woke you up kind of early,” Faith cut in, “I kind of wanted to talk to you about something...”  
     “Oh?” Lizzy flashed a mischievous grin, “More gossip for my eager ears?”  
     Faith gave her a soft laugh, “No, it's something kind of serious.”  
     “Oh,” The woman dropped her expression and put an arm around her friend, “What's up?”  
     Faith sat up straight and turned towards Lizzy, “I just want you to know that... Sometimes me and Carol can get kind of...bossy. But we shouldn't do that; we should let you do what you want to do.”  
     “Where's all of this coming from?” Lizzy asked softly.  
     “Well I was just talking to Peter about something last night, and... Just... I want you to know you can make your own decisions. Don't try to think about how me and Carol will react, okay? Just do what _you_ want to do.”  
     Through her confusion, Lizzy still nodded, “Okay, Faith... Why are you telling me that?”  
     “I can't tell you,” she huffed out, looking pouty now. “But if you don't hurry and get ready, they'll probably leave without you!”  
     Lizzy perked up with her friend, “Well get out, then, weirdo, I've got to change clothes!”  
     “Aww! But Lizzy!” Faith gave an exaggerated pout now.  
     “No 'but's, missy! You march!” Dramatically she pointed at the door, and Faith slumped and shuffled away as they both giggled. With a smile Lizzy looked over to her bag that had already been packed. It sat leaned neatly against her desk. Walking over, she sat down in the wooden chair and gazed up at her newspaper clippings. They all told interesting tales and inspiring stories. They were her inspiration. Looking down, she noticed a notebook that sat askew on her desk. Reaching out to fix it, she tentatively looked at the text she had written:

 

> Q: What made you decide to join the military?
> 
> A: I was drafted.

 

     Her frown came quickly, and she gazed down at her lap. It pained her to imagine Max geared up, gun in hand, shooting and killing people. But what pained her more was the vivid image of him sitting in a trench scared and alone. She imagined his blue eyes wide in fear, and her heart thudded. She wished she could have been there for him.  
     The sun had made the room considerably brighter by the time she looked up. Quickly looking at the clock on her desk, she was relieved to see she had only dozed off for a few minutes. Remembering her last thoughts before she had fallen asleep, she didn't dare to try to remember her dreams. Instead, she stood and got herself dressed for the day. The warm tinge to the late spring air allowed her to avoid layers of clothes for once, and she relished the feeling. New York was drastically cold compared to Texas.  
     Grabbing her backpack, she slung it gently over her shoulder. She waved to Faith as she headed out the door and down the two flights of stairs. Standing in the lobby door she was met with an unexpected obstacle.  
     “Jack?” she smiled, “What are you doing here?”  
     “Oh, I did get you in time! I just came to see you off,” he looked down at the ground.  
     “Aww. That's sweet!” She smiled and pulled him into a loose hug. Leaning away she gave him a punch on the shoulder, to which he flinched just slightly.  
     “Haha, good one! I was wondering if...maybe you wanted to go to dinner tomorrow night? After you get back?”  
     Lizzy fought to keep herself from sighing, “Um... I'll have to think about it. I might be tired when I get back, so...”  
     “...Oh.” Still his eyes stayed fixed on the ground. “That's okay, I guess...” The man wasn't attempting to hide his, in Lizzy's opinion, rather exaggerated disappointment. “Will you at least call me tonight?”  
     “Sure! But hey, I gotta go. Bye, Jack!”  
     “Um...bye!” came his confused voice as she slipped past him. Stepping quickly down the sidewalk, she was glad to have gotten away from him so fast. She had tried to tell him subtly in the past that she just wanted to be friends. But she couldn't find the heart to tell him for not wanting to disappoint Carol and Faith. After all, they had worked so hard to convince her to just _give him a chance_. And she had tried, but... Jack was a funny man...occasionally. It seemed to her, though, that most times she had been laughing, it had been _at_ him. In fact, she wasn't sure if she could ever remember Jack sincerely laughing. What with his _bleeding_ heart, he would probably just cry if she were up front with him. So still she gave him a chance...but she wasn't liking it one bit.

 

✼✌✼

 

     Catching her breath, Lizzy barely had time to knock on the door before it swung wide open. Lucy stood, dressed for the day ahead of them already. Jude waved from the couch where he sat.  
     Returning the gesture, she huffed up at Lucy, “Am I really that loud?”  
     “Only loud enough from me to hear you from the kitchen.”  
     Lizzy smiled before Jude added with a tease, “You should stop smoking.”  
     She gave him a laugh, “Good idea. ...Is Max up already?”  
     Lucy smiled, “What do you think?”  
     Lizzy's green eyes immediately began shifting to either side of the room, “Okay, don't tell him! I'm gonna go hide.” She clamored in past Lucy and quietly stepped over to the couch where Jude sat. She crouched down next to it, and Jude smirked down at her before standing.  
     “I guess that means I'll go get him,” he spoke over to Lucy.  
     She gracefully bowed, “It would be your pleasure.” The two exchanged a soft smile before he left the room. As Lucy looked over, Lizzy gently pressed an index finger to her lips. The girl walked back into the kitchen, and Lizzy began to imagine how Max might react. Suddenly a thought struck her; maybe it wasn't a good idea to jump up and scare him. Again she imagined his wide, blue eyes, and she felt sorry for a moment. But her lips twisted into a smile as she recalled how much Max loved secrets.  
     “Jude, what is it, man?” came his groggy voice down the hall. When she heard footsteps walking into the room, she peeped over the arm of the couch to check and make sure it was them.  
     “...Who's that peeping at me, over there?” Max's voice was surprisingly warm.  
     “Aww, man!” Lizzy gave a small cry of protest as she stood. “You shaved!” she smiled in surprise, “It really accentuates that pale chest of yours.” she teased.  
     “Oh don't _flatter_ me,” he smiled.  
     Lucy came in from behind them, “But you do need to get dressed. It's about time to head out.”  
     “Yeah, yeah,” Max grumbled as he headed back towards his room. Lucy walked further into the room and sat down along with Lizzy.  
     “So!” Lucy piped up, ready for a bit of gossip, “Have you found yourself a boyfriend, yet?”  
     “Well...kind of?” Being able to talk with a girl besides Carol and Faith was always nice when it came to boy talk. “I'm seeing this guy named Jack, but...nothing's really _official_ yet, you know?” Both the girls looked over as Jude quickly left the room, walking down the hall. But their attention returned to the subject at hand.  
     “Do you like him?”  
     “I don't know,” Lizzy looked down and picked at a hole in the knee of her pants. “He's okay, I guess.” An excited shout from the other room caught their attention. There were a few quick, soft thuds before they heard loud laughter.  
     “Those two are so strange,” Lucy smiled. Lizzy noticed the spark in Lucy's eyes as she looked down the hall.  
     “You really like Jude, huh?” Lizzy asked softly.  
     “Like him? I love him.” There was a wistful tone in her voice that left Lizzy struck. She blushed, but looked away from the girl to avoid her seeing.  
     “You sound so sure about it.”  
     “That's because I am!” Lizzy admired the certainty Lucy displayed.  
     “Are we ready to go?” Max was beaming a smile as he walked into the room. He looked over at Lizzy, and she was quick to look away, her heart fluttering. She did push a smile, though, and nodded.  
     She perked up quickly, “I call shotgun!”  
     “That's okay,” Jude smiled, “I didn't want to sit next to this booger anyway.” He patted Max's shoulder and walked over to grab his own rucksack from beside the couch. Lizzy stood and suddenly was filled with excitement. Even though she had moved away so long ago, she often thought about her time there, even after she started living in New York. And finally she could go back. Max walked over to her and grabbed her backpack from her shoulder.  
     “I can carry this for you,” he said sweetly. His tone threw her off, but she recovered quickly.  
     “Oh, all the way to the _car_?” she grinned and snatched the bag away from him. “I think I can manage.”  
     Max smirked and poked at her side, “Smart ass.” She jerked away with a laugh. The four of them made their way out of the door and down the stairs slowly enough.  
     As they sat in their seats of the light blue convertible, Lizzy huffed out a chuckle, “I regret my decision, Max,” she panted, “go back up and carry my backpack down for me.”  
     Pulling his car door closed, Max smiled, “Just admit I'm smarter than you, and I'll think about it.”  
     “Oh, what, because you're a man?” Lucy gave a friendly tease from the back seat.  
     “No; because I'm a _smart_ man!”  
     “Smart enough to start the car?” his sister replied. “Come on, I'm ready to go!”  
     “Okay, okay,” Max smiled, twisting the keys in the ignition, “everyone keep your pants on. ...Except you, Lizzy.” His crooked smirk caught her off guard once again, and she blushed, looking down to the floorboard.  
     “Max, you're such a pervert!” Lucy slapped at his shoulder. Lizzy looked over just as Max had turned away, but she swore she caught a flash of his blue eyes looking at her. A soft smile rested on his face. He must have thought she was such a weirdo. Now she frowned out at the scenery.

 

✼✌✼

 

     Soon Lizzy was pulled into her own world. Her cheek was rested softly on her shoulder, and her gaze stayed fixed to the passing scenery. Every now and again she would break her concentration to look at the rearview mirror. Every time she had, Lucy and Jude were huddled close together, enjoying the wind in their hair and each others company. She couldn't quite place the feeling it gave her, so she would always drag her eyes back out to the road.  
     The past two weeks had been quite a flurry for Lizzy. Between her job, the girls, Jack, and Marcus, she barely had time to spend with Max. It was a shame, too, as she always enjoyed catching up with him. Some days she still questioned if it was a reality, and she would relish the nights she and Max could spend together. She remembered when she had lie in the floor with Carol and Faith, and seeing him walk in felt like a dream. In many ways, her whole life had felt much like a dream to her lately. But some nights it would be difficult for her. She felt bad that whenever she was with Jack, she was always wondering how Max was doing. It wasn't fair to Jack, and she knew it, but she couldn't help where her mind wandered.  
     Again she drifted into reality, and she felt a pang in her heart at the first building she noticed. The large church they used to attend bloomed before her, and suddenly her mind was dancing with memories.  
     “ _There are places I remember,_ ” she began to sing, still leaning into the door in her own little world, “ _All my life, though some have changed._ ” Passing by the church, she strained to remember her other surroundings. “ _Some forever not for better. Some have gone, and some remain._ ” Passing by each recognizable building, bright mirages of her memories danced around it. She would see herself as a child in front of the pet store, getting her first pet cat. “ _All these places have their moments._ ” As they passed a playground, Lizzy saw her first “boyfriend” from the second grade “breaking up with her.” She laughed softly at the innocent memory. “ _With lovers and friends I still can recall._ ” Soon they were passing the house of her mother's best friend. The bright blue vision of several people gathered around the house caught her gaze. She remembered how sad everyone was at the memorial service that was held for her. “ _Some are dead and some are living._ ” As her surroundings continued to grow familiar, she allowed herself a soft smile. “ _In my life I've loved them all._ ”  
     A thought struck her, and she began to move her gaze across the dashboard. “ _But of all these friends and lovers..._ ” Her green eyes rested on Max, who stared ahead at the road with a concentrated look. Her heart fluttered once more. “ _There is no one compares with you..._ ” Max gave her a quick look and seemed surprised to catch her glance. Ashamedly she looked away, attempting to bring her focus back onto their surroundings. “ _And these memories lose their meaning,_ ” again the vision appeared in the town, displaying good and bad memories both. “ _When I think of love as something new..._ ” In misty puffs of smoke the memories began to fade until she could only see the ones of her and Max. “ _Though I know I'll never lose affection,_ ” she gave a soft smile, admiring all of the visions, “ _For people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them..._ ” She was caught again by a vision as they grew close to the school. She stared after as Max had dropped one of his books but left it on the ground, staring at Lizzy who held her head down to her chest.  
     Suddenly turning back to Max she smiled and sang, “ _In my life, I love you more!_ ” Still Max stared at the road, but this time he was frowning. She had forced herself not to ask him what was wrong. “ _Though I know I'll never lose affection...for people and things that went before..._ ” She nodded to herself, staring out the window once more as the peaceful realization surged over her again. “ _I know I'll often stop and think about them..._ ” Closing her eyes, she said her lyric happily, “ _In my life, I love you more!_ ” As they pulled to the driveway of Max's home, she couldn't help but belt out one last, “ _In my life, I love you more!_ ”  
     As the car came to a halt, Jude began to wake Lucy. She didn't hesitate to stretch her arms into the air above them and smile. Lizzy, too, held a smile as she stepped out of the car and stretched her stiff legs. Reaching down, she grabbed her backpack and pushed it over her shoulder.  
     “Okay, Lizzy,” she was excited to see the smile back on Max's face as he approached her. “Remember, you get behind us, and just act really cool when you walk in there.” She gave a quiet laugh and nodded, waiting for Jude and Lucy to get out of the car. They walked towards the house in a small huddle and formed a neat line as they approached the front door. There was little time for Max to knock on the door before it pulled open. Lizzy watched with excitement as they exchanged casualties and walked in. She clasped her hands together quietly and grinned as she walked into the room. They were all exchanging hugs, going down the line, and Mrs. Carrigan just stopped short of pulling Lizzy into a quick embrace.  
     “...Oh my God!” Mrs. Carrigan grinned, “Lizzy Rigby!” Now she did pull the girl into a hug, and Lizzy returned it happily. Mr. Carrigan looked surprised and walked over to investigate.  
     “Well I'll be,” he smiled, pulling her into a hug.  
     Mrs. Carrigan smiled over at her children, “You two are really a handful, you know.”  
     “Us? No!” Max pulled his sister in and ruffled her hair. Lucy laughed and pushed him away. “I met Lizzy in New York a few weeks ago,” Max smiled to his mother.  
     She put her hands on her hips and gave all four of them a sweeping once-over. “Well come on,” she smiled, “Let's go catch up in the parlor.”

 

✼✌✼

 

     A couple of hours passed, and everyone chatted about good times and bad times. Soon they had all shuffled into the dining room and seated themselves. Naturally, the chatter continued around the table as they ate.  
     “So Jude,” Mrs. Carrigan piped up, “were you planning on asking for my husband's blessing today?” Jude and Lucy both blushed, and Max was quick to pipe in.  
     “Yeah, Jude, c'mon man! When are you going to make an honest woman out of my sister?”  
     “Oh, and what about _you_ , Max?” Mrs. Carrigan prodded.  
     “What about me?”  
     “Have you stopped your whole “promiscuous” act yet?”  
     Max smiled, avoiding the question, “What do you think?”  
     “How about you, Lizzy?” Mr. Carrigan finally spoke, “Have you found a nice boy, yet?”  
     Lizzy's eyes opened a bit wider as everyone at the table stared at her. “Oh, uh...” She glanced over at Max, and was surprised to meet his gaze. “There's um...” she looked back over to the table, trying to cover her awkward speech before it was too late, “I'm seeing someone named Jack.” Looking over at Max again, her heart faltered at the sight of a frown. Was he jealous? She recognized that face from such a long time ago. She had seen it several times, and every time she had decided to break some poor boy's heart.  
     “But what about Max, here,” Mrs. Carrigan teased.  
     Lizzy, in her embarrassment, replied quickly, “ _Max_?” she questioned with an airy laugh, “Mrs. Carrigan, I thought you had more faith in me!” Her face grew hot until Jude had piped in.  
     “That reminds me! Max, you should tell your folks about Petey!”  
     Almost reluctantly Max had started to talk about his friend, but his voice grew happier as he continued on. Lizzy stared down at her dinner plate only to realize she'd barely touched her food. And it was _meatloaf_ night – her favorite.  
     Dinner had soon concluded, and Lizzy stared at Max through another two hours of talking. Whenever he looked at her he would frown, and it made her heart sink every time. What had she done wrong?  
     “Well Lizzy,” Mrs. Carrigan brought Lizzy out of her trance, “we didn't set up an extra bed or anything.”  
     “That's okay!” Lizzy was quick to pipe up, “I can just sleep on the couch. I got used to that pretty fast when I moved to New York.” Looking over her shoulder, she saw Jude pushing Max up the stairs, quickly followed by Lucy. She decided it would be best to get her setup ready for the night.  
     “I'll bring you down some blankets,” Mrs. Carrigan offered. Lizzy nodded and gave her a smile before she began to search for her night clothes. Retrieving them, she walked into the downstairs bathroom to change. Looking in the mirror, Lizzy's mind began to buzz. She must have put Max off with all of her glances. Or had her joke at the table upset him?  
     “Stupid...” she murmured to herself, pulling on her loose tank-top. “I'm so stupid...” She had to look away from the mirror and down at the tile under her bare feet. With a sigh she stepped out of the bathroom and saw instantly that her temporary bed had already been neatly made for her. Looking over her shoulder, she just caught the sight of Mrs. Carrigan walking up the stairs. Lizzy couldn't help but smile. Max's parents really were great.  
     She laid down on the couch, her head rested softly on the pillow underneath. She pulled her sheets tight up over her and tried to listen for voices above her. Faintly she did hear mumbles, but soon even they had faded. Staring up at the dark ceiling, Lizzy's heart and head pounded hard. Remembering Max's frown her stomach turned. She just wanted to make him happy, even if it meant them staying just friends. She could live with that. But she had to admit that it would be hard to sacrifice the feelings she had for him. Lizzy remembered the first time she had a crush on Max. Again her mind saw her second-grade “boyfriend” breaking up with her. She sat on the swing, crying, and Max had quickly run up and asked her what was wrong.  
     “Boys are stupid,” she had told him plainly.  
     His sad blue eyes had stung her, “...Am I stupid?”  
     With a smile, she had shaken her head, “Not you, Max! You're my best friend!”  
     “Okay! Can I have your hat?” he pointed out the red baseball cap donning her head.  
     “No!” she smiled. But he took it anyways, and they laughed as they chased each other around the swings.  
     For an odd reason, the memory brought tears stinging into her eyes. Things had changed. She and Max had moved on after she left. Before she could go on with that train of thought, the clear image of Max sitting in his car came to her mind. He had looked so handsome in his suit, but the way he looked at her made her feel faint. “See you later,” she had said aloud, her voice cracking through tears. She remembered shutting the blinds so he wouldn't see her cry.  
     Of course she loved him. That had _never_ changed. But only recently had she started to admit that to herself. But with Carol and Faith pushing Jack onto her, things became confusing. Faith's words from earlier that morning flicked at the back of her mind. Was this what she had been talking about? Lizzy found herself sitting up, her eyes suddenly wide and alert. Her heart raced. Faith must have been talking about Max. She rose to her feet and stumbled through the darkness as quickly as she could. Her feet carried her towards the steps. She didn't know why Faith had chosen that morning to have their little talk, but she was glad that she did. Her heart pounded as she quietly raced up the steps.

 


	12. Do You Want to Know A Secret?

     Max had stood in his bedroom, leaning against the wall beside the door and biting his fingernails. Having just put on a shirt, he smiled as he remembered how Lizzy's face lit up when she observed his clean-cut look. It sent butterflies into his stomach to see her so obviously affected by such a simple change. It wasn't long before he heard Jude stepping down the hall towards his room in his long strides.  
     When he came in, he gave Max an excited smile, “She just said her and Jack aren't 'official.' Max, you may just have a chance yet.” Max couldn't suppress his excited shout, and Jude lifted him a few inches off the ground. He lost his balance and sent them both softly banging into the wall, to which they both only laughed.  
     “Oh, man, I can't wait for this,” Max said in hushed, excited tones. “it's gonna be perfect, Jude. Everything's falling into place!” The men gave each other a quick hug before he continued. “Thanks again for that, man.”  
     “For what?”  
     “The plan! You know, our little secret?”  
     Jude smiled, “Petey helped too.”  
     “Yep! And I know it's gonna work out _perfect_. Come on, let's head back out.” Max was quick to grab the bag he'd packed and head out into the living room with the others. Jude closely followed suit, attempting to contain his inner excitement. Standing before his travel buddies, Max was quick to flash the most charming grin he could muster over at Lizzy. “Are we ready to go?” Lizzy had looked away from him with haste and he could feel that old, familiar and pleasant dizziness. Was she blushing?  
     As they all began to shuffle towards the door, Max had attempted to take Lizzy's backpack for her. In his picturesque imagination he envisioned her shyly blushing and nodding, and at the mental image, his heart soared. But he had been surprised when she refused the offer with a casual joke. It didn't phase him, though. He poked at her side, and for a moment enjoyed seeing her squirm away from him with a laugh. The moment had passed quickly, and soon they were all down in the car, ready to go. That was when Max had decided to brazenly flirt with the girl.  
     “Everyone keep your pants on,” he had said, starting the car, “...except you, Lizzy.” The definite red hue in her cheeks gave him an almost accomplished smile. He was just barely quick enough to look away before she caught him staring.  
     The drive there had been fairly quiet all things considered. Whenever they had gotten to a long stretch of straight and empty road Max would spare Lizzy a glance. Every time she would be staring out of the window, lost in her own little world. Her short, dark hair made loose twirls in the wind that gusted past them. Max pondered briefly on what she was thinking about as he returned his sight to the road, pulling the car back into the correct lane. As they grew closer to their destination he dared another glance, and almost jumped when he made solid eye contact with her. Too quickly, she looked away, and he frowned to himself in turn. He had to be careful not to lay it on too thick, he decided. This _had_ to work perfectly, and it was best not to give it away. But the thought that she may have been uncomfortable under his gaze filled him with a growing sense of worry. So still he frowned all the way home. He had to pace himself. They were still just friends.  
     The vacation's first secret had gone off without a hitch. Max and Lucy's parents had both been pleasantly surprised to see Lizzy again. Really, the whole scene had helped Max to get that little bit of confidence he'd lost on the trip over. Once dinner had started, things were going smoothly. The conversation had started to drone on around him, and Max's mind was in a distant place still doubting and scheming.  
     “How about you, Lizzy? Have you found a nice boy, yet?” Max's heart dropped as his father spoke, and he tried to be subtle in looking over to his friend. How long had be been holding his breath? Taking in a short inhale he started to hear the woman's awkward stammering. Max could feel his stomach turning and a heat waved passed harshly over him.  
     “I'm seeing someone named Jack,” was her short reply. Max fought every instinct to immediately get up and leave the table. Instead, he just glared down at his food while jealousy ate him up whole. He was beginning to feel dizzy again, and _not_ in a good way.  
     “But what about Max, here?” His mom had pitched in, and Max instantly wished that she hadn't.  
     “ _Max_?” Lizzy had responded with jokingly incredulous laughter. He knew she was teasing of course, but at that moment he couldn't quite bring himself to laugh. Their voices began to dull down into a single monotone buzzing around him again before Jude quickly pulled him back into reality.  
     “That reminds me! Max, you should tell your folks about Petey!” his friend was very obviously trying to distract him. Almost reluctantly Max obliged. He remembered their excitement the night before as he, Jude, and Peter all came up with a game plan for Max. And now that plan was being torn asunder. Reluctant as he was, however, he did try to sound excited talking about his friend from New York.

 

✼✌✼

 

     The two hours of small talk after dinner was genuine torture. Now Max was more confused than he'd been in what felt like years. He had been _so sure_ that everything would work out. After dinner, he would ask her if she wanted to step outside. And he would hold her close and tell her just how he felt about her. Those green eyes of hers would sparkle, and then they would kiss. It would have been _perfect_. But apparently, she was “ _seeing someone_.” Max couldn't help the anger slowly bubbling away in his head every time he looked at her. And yet every time he met her watery gaze she would quell his internal storm. Then it would come back as soon as she had looked away. 'What does _she_ have to be sad about?' he would think to himself. And the whole ugly cycle would continue.  
     It wasn't until Max was dragged off the couch and pushed up the stairs by Jude that he had even remembered he was with all of them there. And for a moment, he was glad; he was going to need his best friend's guidance now more than ever. As they clamored into his room, Lucy split off into her own bedroom. Jude closed Max's door and turned back to him with a concerned and somewhat serious expression on his face.  
     “That sounded like her and Jack are pretty _official,_ ” Max had spit out with malice. He wasn't mad at Jude, but... His general annoyance over his whole plan going tits-up wasn't exactly helping his mood much.  
     “Look, Max, it's not over yet.” Jude sounded confident and determined as he assured his frazzled friend.  
     “What do you mean it's not over, man? Did you not see how weird she got when she started talking about _Jack_?” It really was such a stupid name, he couldn't help but think.  
     “She was probably just nervous.” Now the brunette sounded stern, if not a little annoyed.  
     “No! She was fucking _blushing_ over the guy!” Max dramatically slapped both his hands onto his face and began to haphazardly step back towards his bed. Flopping down onto the cold mattress he shook his head in frustration. It was like he was seventeen all over again. “God damn it, Jude, this is _not_ going the way I wanted it to.” Jude was nodding with understanding as he paced over and sat next to his friend.  
     “Just try to get some rest, Max,” was his soft request. “We'll think of a new plan tomorrow. Everything will work itself out. ...Do you trust me?” He gave Max's knee a soft squeeze. Sitting up and moving his hands into his lap, Max gave a slow nod and a shaky sigh. Jude was right, but Max wasn't sure how easy it was going to be to actually fall asleep.  
     “I'll try...” he murmured.  
     “Good. If you need anything, you know where me and Lucy are.” Again Max nodded, and Jude seemed satisfied enough with his response and got up to leave the room. As he opened the door and stepped into the hall he looked over his shoulder with a friendly grin, “I mean it, Max.” With something of a forced smile, Max gave him a playful, dismissing wave, and Jude flicked the lights off and stepped quietly down the hall into Lucy's room. Now Max was finally alone again. He went to go and close the door that Jude had left open, but stopped himself short. It didn't matter. He slipped his gray t-shirt up and over his head before tossing it unceremoniously down to the carpeted floor. He couldn't even be bothered to pull the sheets up over his head when he laid down. Staring up at the dimly lit ceiling, the silence had quickly started to make his ears ring.  
     “Guys!” his own voice rang loudly in his ears. “Guys!” he was calling desperately. He was firing blindly in the darkness while his friends went still all around him. Max desperately tried to dismiss the invasive flashback, rolling himself over to face the wall. Still, the soft light from the hall seemed far too bright to him. He flinched when he vividly heard several loud blasts all around him, trying to swallow him up. Gritting his teeth, he fought the urge to scream and fought his hardest to stay firmly planted in the present. A shadow passing over his blurred vision distracted him momentarily, and the slight squeak of his bedsprings gave him a jolt. A soft hand grazed his shaking arm, and as a reflex, he jerked away. But still, the hand stayed.  
     “Max...” came a soft voice. His eyelids fluttered and he could feel his taut muscles loosening. “It's alright, Max... You're still here at home...” The calm voice slowed his alarming heart rate, and soon he was taking in a quick and heavy gasp. “There we go,” was her friendly encouragement. “Come here.” Gently Max was pulled into a hug, and he turned eagerly to return it. Soft hands slid slowly up and down his back, and a warm face was pressed against his chest. The sweet scent of her hair made him glance down.  
     “Lizzy...” he whispered. He heard a short sniff and she began to shake. “Lizzy...” he repeated her name softly and put his arms around her shoulders. Coming back to his senses faster than he usually did after an “episode,” he soon noticed the familiar feeling of tears against his chest.  
     Before he had time to console her, Lizzy sat up and warmly smiled while she wiped her eyes, “You couldn't sleep either, huh?” she joked gently. He wanted to smile, but he honestly just didn't have the energy.  
     “...Thanks for that, by the way...” he managed to say.  
     “For what?” she ruffled her hand into his hair. It was clear she was still gathering her own wits about her through short sniffles and clearing her throat. “I just wanted a hug!”  
     Max knew she was just playing around to try and ease the tension, but he had obliged her anyway. In one swift movement he had pulled her into his chest once more, and Lizzy let out a soft noise of surprise. Soon she had timidly lifted her own arms and placed them loosely around his ribs. After they had embraced in silence for a few lingering moments, Max finally broke the silence.  
     “What's up with you and Jack?” He did his best to keep his tone civil.  
     Sitting up just a bit, Lizzy looked surprised again, and a bit confused this time too. “...Nothing! I mean he's a nice guy, but...”  
     Again Max's mind buzzed with a wide array of emotions, so much so that he had started to feel light headed again. Unintentionally the man had been gradually squeezing her tighter and tighter until he heard a small grunt from the poor girl and loosened his grip.  
     “I'll be right back,” Lizzy spoke softly. Max was reluctant to let her go when she stood from the bed and turned towards the still-open door. He watched her somewhat sorrily as she tip-toed towards it.  
     As she quietly pulled the door shut, Max started to sing a somber couplet, his voice drowning in sadness. “ _You'll never know how much I really love you... You'll never know how much I really care..._ ” Seemingly pleased with her task of remaining quiet, Lizzy blindly and carefully stepped over to Max's table lamp and pulled the short chain on it. Dim illumination painted a better picture for the both of them, and Lizzy directed herself back to the bed where she sat back down next to her friend. Max had scooted back a bit and drawn his legs into a crossed position on the mattress and stared sadly down at them. After a moment he could feel Lizzy gingerly running her fingertips along his jawline, lifting his gaze to meet hers. Staring into her bright, green eyes, he recalled prom night clearly. She had kissed his cheek, and Max had tried so hard to make sure he would never forget her eyes in that moment, sparkling in delight. Looking at her now, he could swear he saw that innocent excitement on her face once more.  
     “Lizzy,” his voice cracked, “I hate to put you on the spot, but...I just _gotta_ know,” he choked back a small and involuntarily sob, “how do you feel about me?” In response her eyes grew wide, and in turn his heart sank. But to his slight confusion, her lips curled into a gentle smile.  
     “ _Listen,_ ” she began to sing to him, “ _Do you want to know a secret? Do you promise not to tell, whoa oh, oh,_ ” happy tears began to pool in her eyes as she continued to sing. Now Max's heart had started to really pound away in his chest. Lizzy had a secret too, did she?  
     “ _Closer,_ ” she continued, leaning towards him, “ _Let me whisper in your ear..._ ” Chills raced up and down Max's spine as the woman's whispering voice drifted close to his earlobe. “ _Say the words you long to hear..._ ” As her voice cracked at the lump catching in her throat, Max's eyes began to sting with tears of his own, and he felt as though he could barely breathe. “ _I'm in love with you._ ” At Lizzy's last line he was succumbed by a roaring dizziness.  
     “What?” he had barely been able to ask. Not sure quite what he was hearing, Max looked into Lizzy's eyes where he was met with her still bright and shining tears.  
     “ _Listen,_ ” she repeated, much more upbeat and cheerful this time, “ _Do you want to know a secret? Do you promise not to tell, whoa oh, oh,_ ” she repeated, pulling him into a tight and loving hug. “ _Closer... Let me whisper in your ear... Say the words you long to hear..._ ” Max returned the embrace, gently letting the tips of his fingers dig into her back. “ _I'm in love with you!_ ”  
     She pulled away from their tender hug and beamed a bright smile, “ _I've known the secret for a week or two. Nobody knows, just we two._ ”  
     “I can't believe this...” was Max's only, genuinely stunned reply. Despite his near disbelief, a warm and truly happy smile was forming on his lips. At Max's new expression, Lizzy was more than happy to repeat herself in song.  
     “ _Listen,_ ” she swayed with the music that was still surrounding them in the dimly lit room, “ _Do you want to know a secret? Do you promise not to tell, whoa oh, oh._ ” Max started to pull the woman back towards him and into yet another loving embrace. Their foreheads touched, and Lizzy still stared right into his bright blue eyes, “ _Closer... Let me whisper in your ear... Say the words you long to hear..._ ” She cast her eyes down for a moment, gazing at Max's parted lips. Her voice caught short with her sudden nerves.  
     And so, Max finished the song for her, letting her know just how mutual her feelings were.  
     “ _I'm in love with you!_ ” As the music came to a slow and melodic stop, Max still held Lizzy tightly in his arms. With their heads still so close together, Max could not help but notice now where the girl's eyes had wandered. And he returned the gesture, flicking his wanting stare back at her own, much fuller lips. For about the umpteenth time since he had reunited with Lizzy, his heart was steadily and rapidly pounding, and all of his senses were lost to the usual dizzying effect she had on him. But as Lizzy's soft lips pressed against his, everything seemed clear. Finally, he had found he clarity he'd been seeking. That realization elevated him to new levels of happiness, and he kept right on kissing Lizzy for as long as she would let him. When the kissing hadn't stopped for a good long while, Max pulled her gently on top of him.

 

✼✌✼

 

     Max's eyelids parted, and for a brief moment, he could barely remember where he was. Sleepy panic started to flood him in an instant, and in the darkness, he couldn't quite make out the light in his bedroom. That light wasn't supposed to be over there... And where were all the cars honking and distant alarms that usually greeted him each morning? All he could hear was that eerie silence, interrupted by the odd bird chirping. His heart began to race, and as he turned to get out of bed and investigate, he was startled by a sleeping, petite frame next to him. Lizzy was pressed against his side, and the sheets rested just below her bare breasts. Memories from the past few hours were a welcome change to the oncoming despair in his mind. And now that he could properly remember just where he was, and who he was with, Max let himself get swept up by that sincere happiness again.  
     With even his small amount of tossing and turning he'd done, Lizzy began to stir. Her tired green eyes peeked past slowly opening, fluttering eyelids, and in the next few moments she was sat up and stretching her arms up high. Once her yawns and drowsiness had passed, she pulled her legs up to her chest and rested her chin gently on her knees to smile down at Max. She just admired him for a few moments, as he was doing with her, and then she decided to break the sweet silence.  
     “What time is it?” She asked him as though he hadn't just woken up himself.  
     “I don't know,” Max spoke through his content smile, still in very slight disbelief staring up at his newest “girlfriend.” She was his girlfriend, right? But pushing away his doubt with expert ease now, he sat up and gave her a peck on the cheek. “And I don't care.”  
     Lizzy laughed lightly, “I know the feeling...” Max had casually begun running his fingers through her dark hair, and she seemed to be pondering to herself. After only a few strokes of her hair, she voiced her thoughts.  
     “You know, I was thinking... A long time ago, I _did_ break a promise I made with you...”  
     “Oh?” Max asked softly despite his genuine intrigue, “What's that?”  
     “I never said goodbye.” Like lightning, the familiar vision of Lizzy mouthing somber parting words from her bedroom window danced into Max's head. “I'm glad I didn't,” Lizzy added with gusto.  
     “Me too,” Max chimed in. How different would things have been if they had just said goodbye...and eventually forgot all about one another? He didn't want to think about it. And with that decision, he pulled Lizzy close, resting his cheek on top of her head. He never wanted to let her go that night so many years ago, and now he never had to. Max's bliss had started to become too much for him, and he only just noticed tears trying to break through. As if she could sense it, Lizzy pulled away just far enough to observe her lover's face.  
     “I kept one promise, though,” she sweetly smiled, her green eyes matching his, “I _did_ promise I'd make you cry the next time we saw each other.”  
     He couldn't help his laugh, and it caught him in a short sob. “C'mere, _asshole._ ” As Max pulled her firmly closer, Lizzy let out unbridled, joyous giggles that lightly lifted into the morning air. Between her laughter, Max placed a few brisk but rough kisses on her neck, and he watched as her cheeks grew redder by the second. Once the two had calmed themselves, reminding each other that there were still people trying to sleep around them, Lizzy turned her sights out Max's bedroom window.  
     Following her sight, he was taken back by a bold pink streak in the sky, surrounded by thin but brilliant bits of orange, breaking through the once dark night.  
     “Another first...” Lizzy spoke softly, resting her back against his chest, her eyes still set on the beautiful sight just outside.  
     “First sunrise together...” Max added, knowing just what she had meant. She confirmed his thoughts with a small nod. Everything about being with Lizzy felt right, and Max wondered how he had nearly managed to forget her in so few years. Now wasn't the time for those kinds of thoughts, though, and he knew that; it didn't matter. Giving his girl a squeeze, Max let the memories of their intimate time together just a few hours ago trickle into the forefront of his mind. And looking up to the window, he decided to enjoy the sun's peeking rays with her and bask in the first of many shared sunrises to come.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _And there you have it ladies and gents! Big thanks again to[Kmartenn](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Kmartenn) for leaving such lovely comments and inspiring me to post the rest of this story. This is the only fanfic that I've ever actually_ finished _, and it's for one of my favorite movies, so it really means a lot to me. And it means a lot to me that anyone would take the time out to read it and maybe enjoy it themselves._  
>   
>  Oh, and just to clarify! Despite the publishing dates, the majority of this story was written back in 2014. The last chapter was something that I had rushed at the time, so I took the time to go over and edit/add to it. So if the last chapter sounds different from the others, it's because most of it was written now in 2017.  
>   
> Thanks to everyone who read this, and I hope you enjoyed it!  
>   
> 
> 
> # ✼✌✼


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